When Worlds Collide
by TheFerengiKing
Summary: What would happen if you were to throw someone from our universe into the Pokémon universe? Well, I get stuck as the poor guy in this story with his travelers being a soon romantic Gardevoir and a foul mouthed Blaziken through a world of me screwing it all up. Contains Violence, shooting, blood, gore, cursing, and slight sexual content, but no lemons. Rate and review.
1. Prolouge

PROLOUGE:

This story includes multiple amounts of different content. It contains the following:

Violence, Alcohol, Blood, some Gore, excessive Cursing, slight sexual themes, but no lemons, guns, and offensive material.

The categories for this story include:

Humor, Adventure, with healthy amounts of horror and romance.

I do not own any content other than myself and the original added in characters.

Rate and Review, or I get Q.


	2. Through the worlds

CHAPTER ONE: THROUGH THE WORLDS

Me, being the guy I am, I have always wondered other ways to cross, to see, to observe. My idea of peace and relaxation is pretty decent, until I decided to get out. All I had once I left wasn't much to me. I carried on me my archery equipment, a .44 magnum on the side with three boxes of 20 bullets per box, a bottle of wine from 2014, a six pack of good ol' sprite, and a second backpack for everything else I carried or would be soon carrying. I also took my laptop, my phone, and the chargers for both of them, and a mini power generator for charging my electronics.

I'm dressed in an outfit to intimidate people to back off. What I have on is a leather jacket similar to the one on Terminator, a pair of shades with a metallic frame, partially decent jeans, without any holes, and two pairs of T-shirts and shorts. My shoes were black sneakers, while also carrying my indoor shoes in the backpack, and a spare pair of white/gray shoes, also in the 'pack.

Walking through the town I thought to myself, 'This is going to be a long time, for a long way.'

By about 12:44 PM, I was in no mood to ponder my position but to only acquaint myself with a solid reflection of my troubles. My troubles being that I got no destination, no mind of thought, and most importantly, no next step. I sat down on the curb, but quickly got up and ran as a police car was coming, then went behind a building and just sat for two minutes and kept on going.

At 12:58 PM, I was nearing a Shell gas station and quietly sneaked in, taking about 20 dollars and a coke. Obviously, I didn't want much to begin with, but I didn't want to waste my stuff on useless necessities. Skipping over to around 8:30 PM, I didn't know where the hell I was. I was in a middle of a building complex with streets, roads, and alleys. I decided to go into one of those alleys and just relax. Calm myself down from the troubles I have done, even though I didn't do anything.

I loaded my gun first, and began to organize some trash along with a couple of cardboard boxes to form a cheap house. I slid inside, ignoring the coldness of dark from the outside; I slide myself in and finally, truly relaxed. I closed my eyes and fell asleep.

Oh my dreams being in shock of what's happening, I knew I was never going to get anything, why bother, I'll basically become a hobo and, eh, I forgot the rest since I began to wake up.

Once I did wake up, I saw an entirely different view from what I saw before I went to sleep. Something was wrong of course; instead of being in a cardboard trash house in a two building alley, I was sitting under a thick, tall tree, on a patch of grass, in an entrance to a prairie on my left. It was peaceful and quiet with no traffic or people. I wasn't certain how, where or even when I got here but I simply looked around and spotted a dirt pathway to my right.

Seeing the pathway, I told myself, "Well, this I'm sure is not Kansas."

I looked unto the path and saw something crawl in the distance toward the right. It looked like a giant tomato worm crawling under a bush, but, wait, giant? I wasn't sure what I just saw, but I'm not about to stand around or go look at it to try to find out what the hell it is. Looking in front of me was the path that went in two directions. It went to the right and to the left. To me it was one huge gamble, yet to someone who knows this area, where ever it is, they would know it inside and out; it would be a point and shoot.

I decided to go to the left like the Doctor Who episode "Turn Left", since who knows what could happen now. Starting off for about two minutes, I see a large purple butterfly flying in the distance. Now, I knew something was wrong by a longshot. There is no way that the butterfly there was that big since it look break most physics, with the size of its body and wings. The problem was when I walked up to the butterfly to take a good look at it, the thing casted a large shadow over me which showed how big it was. Not only that, but it looked at me with a confused tilt and screeched an, "Eeeeeee?"

I looked in shock screaming, "Holy shit!"

I never seen this phenomenon before and I shot off running as fast as possible to my left down the path. I never thought it could talk, nevertheless if it could do that, then I would need some actual answers.


	3. Welcome to the new world!

CHAPTER TWO: WELCOME TO THE NEW WORLD

Trekking for about an hour, I was checking around looking for more, ahem, strange animals, if that's what you would call them at this point. Around 3 o' clock in the afternoon, I started to get tired and thought of how to deal with these little annoying nuisances. My luck showed up when some guy started walking down the path. He was probably around 18 years, black haired, wearing a brown shirt over a blue one, with blue pants, holding a black, medium backpack on his back. This guy didn't look too muscular, but he wasn't skinny either, more like gaining a little weight.

I grabbed a nicely sized branch and snuck behind the guy, trying not to get caught. I lifted the branch above the back of his head and wacked him good, knocking him out. He didn't know what hit him, literally, yet he did try to grab something out of his pocket. What did he try grab out though, I don't know. I pulled out his hand which revealed what he was grabbing and I nearly gave myself a stroke. It was a little sphere, half red/half white, with a little white button in the middle. If I'm right, the reason why everything was weird and confusing was because I didn't wake up in a different place, but a different universe, the Pokémon one to be more exact.

I thought hard and realized it is from that stupid show. People, like this guy, were usually trainers, and the trainers had a device called a PokéDex. So I said with a hint of confidence, "If he has the little balls, then he must have a 'Dex."

Searching, I found his PokéDex along with a box of food, 4 empty balls, Poke food, and other useless crap I didn't need. So I just took the food and 'Dex, and ran off fast. About two miles away, I looked into the guys stats and said, "Well, here's one good reason for this guy to get mugged."

That guys stats were beginner low and I simply erased it and put down all my information. However, one thing I halted on and thought over was the picture and the name. Getting my photo was easy since I have a student license, but with my name, I will be nicely forging since I have no true reason to give my actual name, err, last name. I thought a bit, and then remembered the Godfather movie and said, "What if I change my name like Vito, no, even better. I'll change my name to, Andolinni."

I laughed at this since I modified my first name a bit, and ended up with Francesco Andolinni. No one would tell my name from the fake one, unless, oh, oh shit. If this is the Pokémon world, then there are telepathies which can go through my head like a goddamn filing cabinet and pull out my true name.

I picked up my stuff and "my" stuff, and marched forward seeing that there must be a town since that guy was going the opposite way of me. It sucked since I only knew a few of the Pokémon creatures, but I tried to avoid as many of them as possible. I got bored after walking for about an hour, so I turned on my laptop and started playing off a few tunes, while having the laptop in the backpack and the speakers running in the backpack.

I first began off with Rawhide from the Blues Brothers movie, and obviously it would make me popular here since nobody would know what the song was. Anyway, I clicked the video and skipped over to 1:00 to hear it play. It began with the guitar and drums, then started with the guitar on the country key and began, with me of course singing along:

" _Rolling, Rolling, Rolling,_

" _Though the streams are strolling,_

" _Keep them doggies movin', Rawhide,_

" _Through rain, wind and weather, hell bent for leather,_

" _Wishin' my gal was by my side,_

" _All the things I'm missin', with fiddles, love, and kissin'_

" _Are waiting at the end of my ride,_

" _Move them on, HEAD THEM UP, head them up, MOVE THEM ON, move them on, HEAD THEM UP, rawhide,_

" _Cut 'em out, RIDE THEM IN, ride them in, CUT 'EM OUT, cut 'em out, rid 'em in, RAWHI-DE"_

Then while they played the guitar, I danced around in rhythm like the guy on table in that video. Then it played again:

" _Move them on, HEAD THEM UP, head them up, MOVE THEM ON, move them on, HEAD THEM UP, rawhide,_

" _Cut 'em out, RIDE THEM IN, ride them in, CUT 'EM OUT, cut 'em out, ride 'em in, RAWHI-DE"_

Then syncing with the guy using the whip, I fired my gun every "HEEYAH", then a gunshot in the sky, ""RAWHI-DE", "HEEYAH", another gunfire, "HEEYAH", then the third gunfire, "RAWHIDE", and then the music stopped as the people in the video cheered off.

"Theme from the TV show Rawhide, thank you."

I turned in off with a bow, and next thing I hear is little clapping with something saying, "Rals"

I thought I was hearing things, I looked left, then right, then I felt something touching my heel. It was a little creature trying to get my attention. It was had a hair due, like Moe Howard, in green, with the rest of it wearing some kind of kimono or dress. In that hair due was a red object that was sticking out. I didn't know what the creature was until it repeated the word again, "Ralts?"

And now I nearly pissed myself as knowing what it was, a Ralts.


	4. A new charecter

CHAPTER THREE: A NEW CHARACTER

(What the little Pokémon was seeing)

* * *

I was minding myself playing a bit in the bushes, nothing much to do though. I enjoyed playing near the path to see if any humans showed up or not. However my parents told me to be careful since some of them are, self-indulgent, as they said. It didn't really mean anything to me since me and my brother, who is a shiny orange, went to the path anyway. We stayed for a bit and he went to go get some bigger sticks to make a little hut to play in.

Once my brother was out of sight, I heard a strange noise in the distance. It sounded like human, and it was a human who came up and was, singing? He was singing to something as I heard a rawhide. Then I hear other humans clapping and shouting as well to the music. This human singing and dancing dressed odd, danced odd, and was, just, odd. He continued his singing going, "Move 'em on, HEAD 'EM UP, head 'em up, MOVE 'EM ON, move 'em on, HEAD 'EM UP, RAWHIDE, cut 'em out, RIDE 'EM IN, ride 'em in, CUT 'EM OUT, cut 'em out, ride 'em in, RAWHI-DE".

The human then took something out and fired it up three times after every heeyah. It shocked me the frist time, but he was doing it to the music, not to any Pokémon. Once the music ended and he bowed while the invisible people cheered and then said, "Theme from the TV show rawhide, thank you."

I started clapping and yelled, "YAY!"

He then turned around a bit, looking confused, and I touched his foot to show where I am. He looked down and I sensed he wasn't too thrilled since he stood there like he was just stabbed by my father. I then greeted him with a puzzled look, "Hello?"

* * *

(Back to my point of view)

"Oh fucking hell", is all I could say as I looked at the Ralts. I wasn't fond to know that the first Poké-whateverthehell, would be a psychic. Oh well, I sighed and decided to take some evidence of my trip by taking a picture of it. However, it grabbed my phone with its mental powers and examined it. I looked at it with a scowl and said, "That's mine, if you don't mind." It didn't listen and I seriously got ticked at it. Somehow it knew I wasn't fine with it and it gave my phone back.

Now I took a picture of it and right after that I heard another sound, bush shaking. Looking over I pulled out my .44 and aimed at the bush. The little green-haired bastard down below, however, lowered my gun down, with my finger still on the trigger, and shook its head. What came out was another Ralts, only instead of green, it was orange. Now I mumbled to myself, "Oh great, two of them."

I sighed once more seeing as this was getting better, and not thinking it could get worst. Then the green hair went cheering, "Ralts, Ralts!" while touching my foot getting its attention. I looked down and said, "Now what is it?"

It pointed in front of me toward the bush and I completely shit myself. A Gardevoir appeared from the bushes and she did not look happy, at all.

She had the same green hair only it fell on her back instead, with the red crystal thing now on her chest, and the dress obviously is now a gown. The only way I knew it was a she was because this species was an all-female type, which was another indication it was the mother of the two littler ones.

Now, using my knowledge of Fanfiction stories about these creatures, pulling out and firing a gun on her was like committing very painful suicide, so instead I put my gun away and put my hands in the air. She came closer, making me a bit nervous, and then telepathically said, 'Get away from here, now!'

Well, first day and already scared like heck. I turned around and walked about 10 yards and turned on some Soviet marching music. Let the choir then play, with the drums beginning, and then the drums march the beat. Second part with the drums and metal guitar, then the third with the drums making a background noise with me marching in rhythm, and the fourth part me marching away in rhythm.

 _Белая армия, чёрный барон, снова готовят нам царский трон!_

 _Но от тайги до британских морей, Красная Армия всех сильней!_

ПРИПЕВ: (2 раза) (Every one of these repeat the following two lines below)

 _-Так пусть же Красная, сжимает властно, свой штык мозолистой рукой!_

 _И все должны мы, неудержимо, идти в последний смертный бой!-_

 _Красная Армия: марш, марш вперёд! Реввоенсовет нас в бой зовёт!_

 _Ведь от тайги до британских морей, Красная Армия всех сильней!_

ПРИПЕВ (2 раза)

 _Мы раздуваем пожар мировой, церкви и тюрьмы сравняем с землёй_

 _Но от тайги до британских морей, Красная Армия всех сильней!_

ПРИПЕВ (2 раза)

(I couldn't get an actual translation. Go learn Russian.)

I was about a good 0.5 to 1 kilometer away from the area. I was finally alone and at peace, but, of course, like in a TV show, which I'm in, I feel a tug on my bottom pants. The damn Ralts followed me all the way over here. Now I'm worried that's its mother will come here and kick the livin' shit out of me.

All now I could do was look down at it and say, "Look, what you want from me, eh? I'm just a normal Looney American conservative walking in a world in another universe being lost as all fuck."

Now its head tilted and fell a bit as tried to understand what I said. Thinking to myself, 'Ok, maybe it isn't all that bad', I retried and said, "Is it possible you know of any town around here?"

It nodded its head and I was finally marking something down that was useful of it. Before I did anything, I told it, "Before we go anywhere, I need to know what gender you are and then name you afterwards, ok?"

It nodded again. I grabbed the Ralts, and checked under and I didn't see a penis so I assumed it was a girl. Then I asked it, "Are you a female?"

The Third nod in a row, good streak. "Alright then", sighing with the trouble of her, "do you have any name?"

Fourth time and now I asked, "Ok, could you possibly write it on the dirt?"

She "grabbed" a stick and drew the letters in the sand. I looked at it oddly since it was spelled out as Welxess. I only said, "Maybe we need to name you something different", as the name looked like she was part Betazoid.

She oddly nodded since the name didn't suit her well either. I thought about names, 'Ok, what kind of name fits for a psychic, white clothed, green haired, possibly in the future murderous, Pokémon. I got one.'

"How about, Midori", I asked, since Midori is Japanese for green referring to her hair.

She happily nodded and I finally got somewhere other than a grave or hell, or stuck in a tree.


	5. A towning we will go

CHAPTER FOUR: A TOWNING WE WILL GO

So, my new traveler, Midori, and I started going to this town that she, apparently, knows. Honestly I wouldn't be surprised if she got lost after two minutes. Thankfully, she didn't and we found the town around 6:20 PM. First stop for me was a restaurant, or a hotel with food. The nearest thing was a restaurant, since it allowed Midori and it was the closest building there. They allowed Pokémon to eat here, so there was no hassle. The real hassle was the shitty food they served. It was as foreign to me as local Vietnamese/Chinese restaurant severing fish organs to a New Yorker.

In the end, I decided to have a simple salad because nothing was reassuring or recognizable on that menu, while Midori got some sort of berry platter. Once it came, she ate fast into it. I decided to reach over and try one of those berries. I popped one in my mouth and it kinda tasted like a sprite. Speaking of which, I had a can right then and there. I popped open the lid and started to drink away, yet Midori looked confused and so did some of the other people at the other tables. Seeing as though I drink things that are way different from what they are drinking, I looked at the people and told then, "Can't I drink without a show?"

They turned their heads fast, back to their food, and we finished up our food and started heading out to find a hotel or inn. I stopped to the nearest store for a few things; however, I didn't buy anything since I didn't know what they had, so instead I went touring around looking at the inventory. At the end of the store they were selling little colorful gems. These were those mega evolving gems they showed on that show and I knew these little crystals were worth a nice fortune. First thought, steal them, second thought, do it at night, midnight being preferable.

Some kind of alarm went because unless my paranoia decided to kick in, I saw, in the corner of my eye, a huge yellow/red fox give me a scowling look, which obviously meant that it knew what I was going to attempt to do.

Marching out the doors of the store, it was about 8:00 PM, so we searched for the nearest place to sleep in. We found a building that had bold letters on the glowing sign that read: CABUS INN. We walked through and the place was cheap, a simple wooden room with a window where the sign is held. My room was better than this, but it was all I could get right now. The woman at the counter then greeted, "Welcome to Cabus inn, how may I help you?"

I was going to get a training permit tomorrow so I needed to forge some information; and if this place had a printer I could do that, making this a two to one kill. I responded to the woman, "Um, first do you happen to have any kind of printer?"

"There is one in the back. I can show you if you would like."

"Alright thank you. Second are there any rooms currently available, *unless my luck died*", I mumbled on the last part. So far there seemed to be nothing wrong as I could use the printer plus the computer to forge an ID card.

The woman then looked up from checking the computer, "Rooms 4, 7, and 13 are free."

"And the cheapest would be?"

"That would be Room 4."

"At what price?"

"The beginning price is 40 Pokédollars at three days."

"You wouldn't happen to take American dollars, would you?"

"Let me see."

I showed her a $100 dollar bill and looked at it trying to figure out where it came from. Apparently Benjamin Franklin along with the "In God We Trust" motto didn't exist here, so after a while she gave up and said, "Sorry, I can't take since I haven't seen anyone before carry that."

"Does this 'Dex have some cash?"

I gave her the 'Dex, and it definitely had cash in it as the computer rang it up. Now that I was in, I asked her to show me where the printer is. She showed me in the back as she originally said. Once she left, I began uploaded the 'Dex picture of me and printed it out. Midori tried to figure out what I was doing, but lost interest as soon as the paper came out of the printer. She then "picked" it up and looked at it.

(Midori's POV)-

* * *

My friend was going back and forth putting in letters and numbers, somehow sensing slyness in his actions, then a piece of paper came out of the machine. It showed his picture, name, home, and some numbers.

* * *

(My POV)-

Seeing as the Ralts was examining my forged info, I went over and said, "Yeah this is me", while pointing to my picture, "and this is my name over here, Francesco Andolinni."

Midori looked at the name and she shook her head, fuck. She knew it was faked, so I tell her, "I changed my name, ok? However, you can just call me frank. And don't give me that master shit since it makes me look like a slave owner", sounding a little more nonchalantly at the end.

I took the paper from her, walked out after deleting everything on the computer, and went to hotel room 4. Cheap was an over statement, but was getting near. It was a small room, about 12x12, with a brown couch spanning 5.5 feet, a chair on the side of the entrance with a window straight ahead at the wall, a small kitchen, luckily, and to top it all off, a two bed bedroom. It was 9:24PM and Midori was already getting sleepy so I put her to one of the beds and she fell asleep.

Now you are probably thinking I would go to bed too? You're wrong since I stay up until about 11:15. For two hours I watched some George Carlin, listened to some music, without singing it, and typed up my "captain's logs". Once 11:15 went around, I thought it was time to go and steal off those mega gems.

I snuck outside my room without the slightest of noise and found the glass door of the inn to be locked. I looked behind the desk and found the keys to the doors in the drawer. Now putting away those keys, I walk outside with an egg carton. I blended in with the shadows walking to the front of the store. Closed and locked in the front, well duh, of course, but not guarded. I turned to plan A, since plan B was the front, by breaking in the back.

At the back, the door was locked as well, so I pulled out my .44 stuck it at the lock, covered it with a towel from the bathroom, and pulled the trigger. A gunshot was heard, from a short distance, but not enough to alarm anyone. I kicked the door, opening the back, walking through trying to find those gems. Behind glass of course, yet that was too easy since walking behind the counter and taking them was easy. It was just too easy. Wait, too easy?

This was a trap, I've seen this too many times in the movies; I grabbed all the gems I had, requiring one pair for when Midori once she evolves twice. I darted to the back exit only to see the door locked in. I knew someone was in here. Checking with panic, nothing, then a sound of a pot hitting the floor, I grabbed a flashlight. Showing a slight of red and yellow, it must have been that fox character.

Tricking it would be hard since the fox outfoxes you, not the other way around. I thought carefully, then I pulled my gun out and then said like an acting role, "I'm just hearing things, probably just my head going." I point the gun to the door, and then, within a split second, I turned a 180 and fired. Then someone scream, "DELLLLLLLL!"

A thud with trash hitting the floor, I knew it. I walked over, and just as I thought, it was a Delphox. These "little" bastards can read minds, but can't read acts. I looked over it as it held both hands, err, paws to its shot knee cap, bleeding on the floor. I began to start talking like Dirty Harry, "Well, you're pretty damn lucky punk. But how lucky can you get with a shot to the knee?"

It shot me a glare and telepathically said, " _Not as lucky as you, you little piece of shi-Ah_!"

I kicked him the other knee, and then I replied, "Well, I knew you were going to do something like this, but I can't tell a good lie now could I?"

He then screamed, " _The police will kick your ass once they get this known!_ "

"And I'll be gone by then." I showed a grin and walked out, chuckling like a villain. Fired a bullet in the lock of the back door, again, and walked right out.


	6. Lets 'a go

CHAPTER 5: LETS'A GO!

Of course the Delphox was going to get to the police, but I said it before, I'm gone. I sprinted over to the hotel and got past through the doors. There were four pairs of Mega gems at my hands and they were probably around 15 to 20 thousand dollars. It was around 2:00 AM and I was already going to become infamous and known, in this town. I got into my hotel room and checked to see if Midori was still in the bed. She was there, asleep; so I, calmly, got into the other bed and snoozed away.

In the morning, I woke up unpleasantly when a chair crashed on top of me. I was enraged, shocked, and in pain, with a little Ralts standing on the other bed with a worried look on her face. I was pissed off of course and she knew it. I first got out of the bed, put the chair on the floor, crossed my arms, and told her calmly, "Was that a smart idea?"

She shook her head. I continued saying, "The next time you think of some kind of shit like that, just wake me up normally like I don't know, shake my head a bit, kick me a little. Don't wake me up by taking a piece of furniture and throwing it on top of my balls."

I sighed seeing how pathetic this was, it was like arguing with a three year old, unless that is what she is though. After a crappy morning, I looked at the time and said, "OK, now I see why you did what you did. It's about 11:00 already. We have to get out'a here before something happens."

(Midori's POV)-

He was worried about something. Why would Frank be this worried about leaving the town? It was peaceful and quiet, until we got outside of the building. There were people around the store entrance, Frank then looked down to me and said, "Just keep moving, apparently there was a robbery."

(My POV)-

I knew that it would be found, however no one was thinking about me walking by so it was a breeze to exit. I saw some of my bullet pieces and some empty bullet cartridges that they pulled out. I took my new ID card; put it into my archery pack's pocket, then took the 'Dex and broke it right there and threw it into the little river without anyone seeing it. Midori was confused, so I explained to her, "You see, I'm not a trainer, or at least not yet. If I can find the Lumonise city center place or whatever the place is called, I can get a new 'Dex, and we can put you as a legally captured Pokémon."

Midori then turned and pointed toward a building, I looked up and saw the building. I saw the convenience and then said, "Oh. Let's go with your plan."

There was a center right there that I didn't notice until we were at the edge of town. I walked in, and the place was pretty spacious. Good sitting room, cloned nurses running the place, and the other people with their Pokémon going in and out for checkups and examination, or just simply recovery. I walked up to the counter and one the "clones" came up and said, "Welcome to the Pokémon center, how may I help you?"

I responded, hoping there wasn't another psychic around, "Yes, I would like a training permit and Midori here for a check."

"You're not a trainer?" she responded as she looked at me and then Midori.

"Nope, I'm just your average Rebel conservative, Trump supporting, loony American with a Ralts on his side and a lot of antiqued American music."

The nurse had a sweat drop appear on the side of her forehead with some people and Pokémon looking at me weirdly, and Midori giggling. The nurse then replied, "Um, anyway you can register your Pokémon here while you take the test in order to qualify to become one."

This shit, well; I lied through the test like I treat everything nicely, passed all the questions, and passed the test within an hour, and I mumbled to myself, "Is there any more retarded qualification I must do?"

Luckily there wasn't any more and all that was needed was for me to give out my information. The nurse, obviously, asked the following questions, "Name would be?"

I started answering, "Francesco Andolinni, and I'll Have to watch over your spelling to make sure its spelled right."

As she typed in the letters, I had to correct her, "ce no che… that's an I and that's also an I."

Next she asked, "Place of town is?"

I decided to fake where I lived, "Uh, Malles, Unova."

"So, wouldn't it be just Malles then?"

"I don't know."

"Do you have any current family members?"

"Here's my card."

I decided to hand her my card as she put it in so I wouldn't need to play 20 questions for the next eight hours. Once she was done, she then smiled out, "Alright, you've been registered and you're an official trainer. Here are your six Pokéballs and your Pokédex."

I took everything and threw the ball at Midori, which caught her, yay, and the nurse also gave me a small bag of food for Midori. I took it and the nodded, "thanks *and good riddens*." I mumbled the last part out so no one could hear that, except for a Chansey who put on an unhappy face after what I said. Once we left the center, there was a larger crowd outside the store than this morning, or around noon, or something. The store was across the street to my left, but my great luck and fortune brought me a fucking police barricade on my right which was the town's exit.

I didn't panic, but I wasn't getting a good picture of what would happen if I stayed any longer. I decided to go up to one of the police officers, who were also clones, and asked, "Excuse me officer, but how long is this barricade supposed to stay in effect for?"

The officer turned around and the replied, "For about three hours, sir. We know the thief hasn't left yet, but we are going to make sure that."

I turned away and walked back to the center. I whispered to Midori, "You're gonna have to learn how to teleport."

Then Midori said happily, "Ralts Ral."

In a split second we were on the other side of the barricade and I looked around shocked, saying, "Holy shit, you actually teleported over them?"

"Ralts!"

"I need to get better communication than this."

We walked away from the town acting like a bunch of idiots since they couldn't find the thief, a.k.a, me. After walking about an hour, I pulled out some beef jerky for me and gave Midori her food. On the way to the city of Limo-whatever-the-hell, we walked by some other Pokémon. I mumbled out what they looked like while passing them by. "Stupid ferrets", about two miles later, "green Snivy wimps", and finally stopping after five miles, "One very pissed off fire bird", only the bird thing then busted out of the forest onto the path even more so pissed.

The thing screamed out in deafening proportions, "BLAAAAAAAAZE!"

I scanned it as a Blaziken and I told myself, "Who the hell ditched you"?

On the verge of crapping myself, I tell Midori, "Psychic blast this dick out of the way."

She fired and missed him, only for him to retaliate and blow torch in front of us. And basically shitting myself, I told Midori then, "Use your damn head and throw his ass somewhere else, into that lake possibly."

She then psychically, and nervously, grabbed him and he went flying a good 100 yards into the lake. And we got to watch the lake creatures kick the crap out'a him. We sat there having lunch and a nice show, until he then went flying back to us. I told Midori, "Use the energy blast and fire at will."

She launched the attack and knocked the bird out. I walked up to it and then threw a ball at it. Captured him at last, I thought, 'I sell this character off for a few hundred, maybe thousand dollars, I don't know.'

Then the ball went floating to Midori and I see her shaking her head, and I then said, "Do you seriously want this guy with us?"

She nodded her head and I thought, ' _Well, she IS something else_.'


	7. A party, I see?

CHAPTER SIX: A PARTY, I SEE?

Walking from the battle, we continued our way for 10 hours until 5:00PM. We walked into another town, about the size of the last one, and I went in to drop off the birdbrain's pokeball into the 'center. We walked in and I told the nurse as I placed the 'ball, "Here's a pissed Blaziken, goodbye."

As I turned around, Midori took a magazine and threw it at my head. She wasn't going to let me go ahead and ditch the bird; however, I didn't give a damn and kept on trying to leave. We stared at each other for about three seconds and I then darted off to the exit, only for Midori to take a chair and have it go at me the opposite way. I was hit by the chair and sat down in it while being dragged back to the desk. She beamed as she won and I said to her, "You smug son of a bitch. On second thought I'll have the 'mon here checked out."

The nurse, and just about everyone else, were still trying to understand what just happened. I laughed and said, "I may have won as well."

The Ralts then floated up and waved her hands in front of the nurse's face. It was hilarious to watch, and Midori gave up as her plan failed. We walked out to the entrance and a guy bumped into me and said, "Watch it ya' idiot!"

I replied nonchalantly, "Sorry ya' prick, I have to go find a hotel so I don't have to deal with assholes like yourself."

"Oh, and that gives you a right to scream at my face?"

"On the contrary, you're the one screaming. Let's go Midori, this guy got no balls for all the ones in the pokécenter, if he catches my drift", ending that one in a smile while turning away. The guy then took a moment and then realized my innuendo suggesting something.

He then burst out without thought, "I challenge your ass to a fight!"

I replied, being a smartass, "Hang on here, Midori is a Ralts, not an ass, there is a very significant difference."

The guy was pissed and confused, "AAAAAHHHH, Bisharp get out!"

A red light and then an axe headed Pokémon came out going, "Bisharp!"

I looked at the metal man, then toward Midori and said, "Kid, you're fucked."

So outside the building we were about 50 meters apart, groups of people were watching the whole scene though. On the sideline, a guy asked, "I'll be referee if you want?"

I said toward him, "You can be referee during the Pokémon battle. Once this is over, I want no referee so I beat the shit out'a this guy myself in a human battle."

The challenger then said, "Ha, yeah right."

The sidelined referee then said, "All right then, fight!"

All hell broke loose, the challenging guy commanded, "Use axe head!"

And the thing charged like Toro straight at Midori, and I told her, "GET THE FUCK OUT OF THE WAY!"

She dodged and the axe into the dirt. Up again I told Midori, "Do something!"

She then stood there like she was staring at the Devil and the guy then commanded, "Use Energy charge to take her out!"

The Axe man charging at Midori, Midori charged up an energy ball, only with me turning away, and a very huge explosion with the axe man being knocked out cold. I stood there, the ass on the other side stood there, the whole crowd stood there, even the two thieves I saw hiding in the bush stood there, Midori was bright white. And poof, she grew hair on the sides with the red horn thingy on her chest and the little gown now some sort of skirt made of white strips. She then fainted after her transformation and the fight.

A Kirila, now it's getting better by the moment as the guy on the other side was raging, "How the fuck did that happen!?"

I looked at Midori and then at the guy, replying calmly, "I have no idea myself", I walked up and grabbed Midori. Looking at the metallic character, I mentioned, "It's a good thing we are battling outside the center here. You better drop off your Iron man and get him fixed, if the nurse is still working correctly, because she is, I think, still having a blue screen error."

Walking away, I now searched for the nearest hotel and checked in. Being that I'm not going into details, I checked in, and got a room, Room 6 to be more precise. It's a fine room with two bedrooms, a kitchen, a TV, and a good amount of power outlets for me to do my stuff, A.K.A laugh at comedy, Family guy, and South Park, shit like that.

I took out one of those balls and popped out the Blaziken guy and he was calmer, but was furious and spiteful. I told Midori, "You think I could get a translation from that psychic shit of yours?"

" _Okay_ ", I nearly got a stroke as I heard Midori talk, and then I remembered she can do that since she was a psychic.

I told her, "Just do it please, psychic talk looks to weird and I need to understand what the hell this guy is selling."

So she put her hands on the sides of my head and then, wham. I was knocked out for a good hour and woke up with a nice headache. I said, "Please tell me that fire bird didn't do something stupid."

"No, but he did say he would like to kick you repeatedly in the stomach", I saw Midori come in, actually talking, not that telepathic crap.

"Oh, well then tell him that I'll take my .44, and shoot one of his legs, and then ditch him in the dumpster outside with a tombstone and some flowers."

I heard a voice yell out in the kitchen, "You can go fuck yourself, ya asshole."

"He seems to have good temperament."

Midori then shook her head sighing, "Do you always have to go shoot everything?"

"Eh, pretty much. Also—where the hell is my magnum?", I started searching around the bed.

"I put it in the bush outside so you don't go shooting Blaziken."

"Hmm, good precaution, bad idea since now I gotta use my Glock 18."

"You have another gun?"

"Along with a hunting rifle and bow as well with at least 20 arrows."

Midori sighed and went to the window on the far side of the room, opened it, and "picked" up my .44, and gave it to me. The bird man didn't look too pleased but that's his problem. Now that it was 10:50 PM and I said, "Ok I'm going to watch a bit of Carlin, you two can to bed."

The Blaziken then asked, "Aren't you suppose to put us in those damn balls?"

"I'm not sure there is a bed in there but if you want-."

He interrupted me saying, "No, no, I'll take the bed, thank you very much", and he walked off to the bedroom second bedroom.

Midori asked me, "Is it alright if I sleep with you tonight?"

The Bird casted me a WTF look and I looked back at him and we exchanged glances until I said, "Sure what can kill me, well actually both of you can do that."

About 11:20PM and I went off to bed. In one room slept the bird, in the other bedroom was Midori on one bed and a second bed that was empty. I got into the empty one and Midori came in my bed saying, "I'm not gonna kill you if that's what you're thinking."

I replied, "Oh no, I was thinking other things that could happen", being sarcastic at the end.

"Only in your dreams or maybe in the future."


	8. The champion goes down

CHAPTER SEVEN: THE CHAMPION GOES DOWN

The next morning, at 6:35, I got out'a bed slowly and snuck over to the nearest store and stole a tent. Unlike last time, there wasn't some brave moron standing in the way and getting shot. However, on the TV in the room, they were showing some DNA samples that were related to the bullet about me shooting the last brave dumbass. I listened in to see how close they got it:

"Officers say that the mystery thief that robbed the Cabus store has stayed in at the town's hotel as we have traced the evidence through a thorough search for DNA evidence. It has been concluded that the trainer known as Francesco Andoliny," I laughed at the way they mispronounced it, "has stayed in this room and has the DNA prints on these bullets. This officer here was the one conducting the search; tell me has there been any other evidence supporting this robbery?"

They showed another one of those damn cloned officers as she explains, "We have seen this man originally walk up to me", I crapped myself on that note, "And ask how long the barrier would be in effect. We kept the border under heavy surveillance and yet he was out of the town past our border lines."

"And how did he get past?"

"He had with him a Ralts which probably used teleport to pass our over barrier."

"This will be a notice to all towns in the Kalos region, if you see this man," while showing a picture of me with a hat and shades, LOL, "or this Ralts", showing Midori, "whose name is Madory"; the news here sucks just as bad as CNN, "then contact your nearest police office or officer immediately."

Being that I was a criminal in this region, I thought my luck could probably turn around; Alright fine, I just bullshitted myself right there, it will be getting worse. I decided to turn off the TV, and go make breakfast.

Coming out of the room to my left was the U.S.S Blaziken Arrogance Center, who looked as if someone blew up a pillow on his body. I decided to greet in Japanese by saying, "Ohayoo, kimi wa fakku shite iru okureta faiyābādo."

He looked baffled and then groaned, "What the hell does that mean?"

"I said 'morning, you fucking retarded firebird.'"

"Oh, in that case, good morning to you to ya foreign asswipe."

"It took you that long to figure out I'm foreign?"

"No, but I wanted to make sure."

After the early morning gutter mouth convention, Midori came out of the room and muttered nonchalantly, "Please tell me that Frank didn't shoot you in the leg."

I replied going, "No, but I will be kickin' the hell out'a him later if he does become trouble."

The bird walked out of the kitchen, rolling his eyes up and sighing, only to sit down and, well, do something. So I decided to ramp things up by saying, "Earlier today they were saying about a party goin' on at the Luminose city. It's at 11:00 tomorrow and if we move our asses, we can get there, and you two can do whatever the fuck you want."

The Blaziken acted like a smartass saying, "Can we take your gun and shoot you with it?"

"Only if you want to be shot first with it."

Midori was more curious since I wouldn't go and party off. She asked, "What's the reason for this?"

I answered, "One because seeing him out sight would be nice," with me pointing over to the firebird, "and two being that there is a certain someone who's gonna be there that I would like to get something at."

"Who would that be the guy at the center?"

Midori did make a point but no, there was someone else there. "No Midori," explaining the second reason, "a certain son of a bitch I would like to throw off a 50 story building, not that guy at the center, who technically deserves a bullet to his leg. Good guess, but no it's not that guy."

So we made breakfast, exited, walked for about 9 hours, only the bird walked 2 hours and refused to walk further. I moved him to the ball, and Midori and I kept on truckin'. I stopped at the nearest area and soon I put up the tent. It was large enough for the three of us, but I figured that the Blaziken would've wanted to stay in his ball. I let the bastard out and asked, "Since we are staying for the night here you have a choice this tim-."

He then cut me off grinning, "I'm going to the ball, not here."

"Ok, back ya go."

And within a second the red light engulfed and he was gone. Midori and I shared the sleeping bag, which I also stole, and we went to sleep. In the morning, I woke up and decided to listen to the news. All I had was a Sirius XM radio, so I tried to tune it in, and my luck was extraordinary. I heard something about Trump diplomats with the North Koreans. I had connections to my universe. However, I turned it off as I heard a bush move.

I looked over and heard a 'wa' sound. I hid behind the tent and then two people, one man with blue hair and the other a red haired woman, a cat, and a blue something come out and I walked out and said, "Are you people lost or are you going to start causing trouble."

The cat then said, "Trouble is our middle name."

"Oh really, how about dead shot up cat 'n idiots', hmm?"

That ticked them off a bit as the red hair went, "You can't just tell us what you think we should be called."

The blue hair talked, "We'll teach you something!"

The cat then stood up front, "Charge!", and they popped out a floating squid and some sort of pumpkin ghost.

I sighed, pulled out my gun and shot them all in the leg, except the ghost didn't get hurt because, it's a ghost. Then Midori came out and said, "What is going on?"

I replied, "Oh nothing, just a group of assholes, that's all."

She looked over them and said, "You do realize you just shot team rocket members, right?"

"I don't give jack shit if they are from the Chinese government of nationalists, blow these idiots away."

In that moment, Midori shot an energy ball at them and blasted them off while the crooks yelled out, "We're blasting off again", with a flash at the end.

I got the bird out, we cursed at each other for 5 minutes until Midori threw a couple rocks at us, then we continued onward. At 10:30 AM, we were outside the Luminose city and walked in to find where this party was. At around 11:20, we found it. The building was huge with a massive, white wall for the front, with the right side having a balcony every story and a tree at the fourth story, with a sidewalk leading under the tree. A fine entrance as it looked, and was, a millionaire mansion.

We all walked in and the place was a rich man's dream. The décor was fashionable and pristine, the floor was reflective, and the people were, oddly, well dressed with some, like me, being a shabby man with money. I tried to locate a restroom, then after finding one, I told my 'mons, "Alright, within reason, go do something, I'm goin' to attend to my own form of business."

Midori then reminded me, "Don't go shooting up the place like at the tent."

Then in a higher pitched mock voice, I go, "Yes, yes, I won't go shooting up the place. Now go enjoy yourself while there are plenty of rich, trouser stains to look at and good drinks."

I walked through the floors, looking for that certain person. Searching floor by floor, there wasn't a single guy who followed on the description. At the sixth floor, I was about to give up, until I saw little yellow thing move. I walked over to the balcony door to see what it was. I peeked through the door and I found who I was looking for. It was that black haired, hat wearin' prick with his Pikachu friend. I then whispered to myself, "Well, well, well, if it isn't Ash Ketchum, the kid who saved the world, and shit. I 'ma gonna knock this praised bastard off his damn feet, or flip him off his feet."

I sneak close behind him, without his friend hearing me, crouched down so I can grab his feet and flip him over the railing. Before I do that he leans over the railing seeing who is down there, and I grab the bottom of his feet and flip him in a second. He went a good 180 degrees, face first in the railing poles with the Pikachu falling down. His weight flipping away from the railing caused it to snap off, having him fall from the balcony and into the tree branches. His Pikachu hit the sidewalk, then Ash himself fell out of the tree with his legs hitting Pikachu in the head knocking him out, then a few branches hit Ash in his back, ass, and legs, and finally the railing hit him from the lower neck down. All of it happening in a span of only 10-15 seconds. No one, not even him, saw what happened, so someone might think it was an accident or some shit like that.

The main problem was, was that he wasn't dead, but at least I think he isn't. Even he isn't though, I did something to nicely injure him. Walking calmly down the stairs I went to find Midori and the fire breathing ass. It's easy to find them, tricky part now is to get them out. I walk up to the two and tell them, "Alright we're gonna have to leave."

Midori glared at me and then spoke up, "You pushed a kid off the balcony, didn't you?"

"One, yes, two, at least I didn't shoot the guy", trying to prove some innocence. Midori then said, "Well, you better move quickly and put your "Eric Cartman" away. He kind'a got hyped."

"On what, marijuana?"

"No, some high alcohol contented beverage."

I hear the blaziken say, "I think that rich fatass needs to chop off his ass!"

"Let me see", I try some of the liquor that was on the table and then confirmed, "Some sort of rum/whiskey concoction, oh well."

I took out the Blaziken's ball, put him in, and me and Midori walked out the entrance. When we were out of the building, we went to our left seeing a crowd encircle the accident. It was one hell of a bloody mess literally. The main body was leaking blood as a rail pierced his jugular, and the Pikachu as a foot was placed on his head along with a thick branch and a railing bar to finish it off.

I see police there, so I change my hat and put on some regular glasses, which is just glass, no lens. I walked up to the officer and asked, "Excuse me officer, but, what happened here?"

The officer turned around her head and then sternly said, "Someone committed a murder by killing this boy and his Pikachu."

I thought to myself, _'Holy shit, I actually killed the fucking prick after all._ '

I asked the officer, "Who is he though?"

The officer actually didn't think about that and walked up to see who it was. A shock went to her face instantly and then stuttered, "I-it's A-ash Ketch-chum."

Everyone was shocked and in an uproar and I secretly smiled in my head with Midori standing right there next to me with one hell of a scowling and scolding look on her face. She telepathically said, _'You son of a bitch, you went ahead and killed someone_.'

I replied telepathically, slightly spooked by the telepathy, _'No one knows who I am, and I don't think we have the time to argue this shit over. Let's just go_.'

She pulled on my arm, _'Bullshit, you killed him and now you're going away_?'

 _'Yeah, so_?"

Midori was confused and then started scanning my head, which I hated. She then got where I was going and said, 'Alright _, this was the only character you wanted to knock off, but do that stunt again and you can see yourself being thrown off the balcony onto the pile over there._ '

 _'Deal._ '

We finally left while people were leaving the scene anyway, and a news crew came in about a minute later. Then we walked off to where ever the hell we were walking off to with Midori taking a sharp stick and jabbing it into my arm, with me screaming out loud, "FUCK!"


	9. A gym, and another problem

CHAPTER EIGHT: A GYM, AND ANOTHER PROBLEM

As I recovered from Midori's stab at the center, we walked over to the tower that stood over in front of us. Must be a good 200-300 feet wide entrance in the front, however we walked through the entrance and I saw one of the Ash's friends, two actually. The blonde guy came up and then greeted us, "Welcome to the Lumonise city gym. You're here for the badge aren't you?"

I replied with a smartass tone, "Yes, and we will drop by again later and drop off a couple of Nazis to have you and your sister taken to a concentration camp to have you both gassed to death. That or I'll go get Hitler, but mainly yeah a fight please."

The two kids looked at me like I was saying go to hell and fry there. Midori slapped herself saying, "If you want to make an ass out of yourself every time you talk to someone, leave me out of it."

"Deal, but first let's kick this guy's ass."

The blonde man replied, "Alright we'll fight, but not under that amount of language."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, anyway, I want to get this fight over with, so I can kick some sense into the Blaziken."

The guy looked at me and then said, "Right, onto the field."

The field looked like a dirt spot, and the man then called out, "Ready?"

I replied going, "Yeah."

The referee, who was the sister, then yelled, "Begin!"

We obviously got our pick, only the jumpsuit man went, "Luxaray, come on out."

It looked like a blue/black tiger with a star shaped tail ending, I told Midori, "All move on up."

She went ahead, and the first thing that happened was the man going, "Use thunderbolt!"

And the tiger charged up, yet I told Midori calmly while standing still, "Use your head and throw him up."

Midori "grabbed" the tiger and he went way up, and went slam into the dirt. He was still moving, until Midori independently shot an energy ball at him, knocking it out. The girl went, "Kirlia wins, Luxray is defeated."

The guy looked puzzled and then said, "Um, Luxray return," and he puts his tiger friend while pulling out some rabbit. "Bunnelby, go!"

A rabbit, my God this was pathetic. I switched out Midori and called out the Blaziken, "Alright, skipping the gutter mouthing, kill the rabbit."

He then questioned what I meant, "Kill it?"

"You know what I mean," Hoping that this would end soon. The man told the rabbit, "Mudball!" and the mudball was formed and shot at, yet the bird dodged and I then commanded, "Leap forward and kick 'im in the groin."

That proved worthy as his rabbit when flying nearly 50 feet in the opposite direction after being kicked. Knocked out well, I then said to the man, "If you're a gym leader then I must be Bernie Sanders."

Two down, one to go, He teleported his rabbit and came out a green thing, happily and readily going, "Chespin!"

I laughed saying, "Um, you do realize what you have right?"

This made the blonde go, "Well, this is all I got."

I mumbled to myself, "Shit and I thought I had nothing."

The last round went and all hell broke loose as the bird went straight in for the "kill". He went fire kick right into the green thing and it went flying the same way into the wall like the rabbit. I won the whole thing with no major issues. He then walked up and handed me the badge, congratulations and shit, money, and out the door we went. I then told my two 'mons, "Alright because of the pathetic battle you went through, I'll get everyone a beer."

The Blaziken looked shocked but then said, "Yes!"

Midori shook her head and said, "And why should we go drink?"

I replied, "That's your choice."

We all went to the nearest bar and, of course, I went for the wine and Blaziken went for the higher alcohol beverages. Midori then was sitting down once I came over and said, "Alright, I know I'm being slightly reckless."

She turned her head quick and gave me a stern glare, "Slightly? What fucking drugs have you been on lately?"

"Let's see, uh, currently I'm on alcohol. And, yes, I have done some pretty stupid shit so far, yet it isn't like I'm regretting anything, really."

"You murdered a kid, one of the most famous, and you're not regretting that?!"

I drink a bit of my wine and say, "Nope, not one bit of the slightest."

Midori, thinking that I was chalked up, checked me over for guilt, however to her amazement, I was right. She then looked at me plainly and further more continued, "I can't believe this, my own friend, is a psychotic murder and drinks as if he was a drunkard."

"Now, now Midori", I soothed while half way done with my wine, "No one knows where I am and nobody knows if you're a Kirila. That and I'm not psychotic or a drunkard, but I do wonder", trying to change the subject, "if alcohol makes you evolve faster."

"Actually, I'm not sure myself."

Midori then took off a bottle of Kanto whiskey and drank the whole bottle. I sat there and said, "Shit, why not just use my .44, eh?"

She didn't respond, only in a drunken accent as the alcohol kicked in, "Well, (hic) I thought a bottle of that stuff would be enou (hic) gh to do it."

My situation just kept getting better, I had a drunken Blaziken and a drunken Kirila, all we're missing is me to be drunk and all of us walking down the street naked singing ' _Nobody knows how dry I am_ '.

I returned the firebird to his ball and tried to get Midori into hers. However, she took the ball and put it into my backpack and teleported us to an empty hotel room where she just passed out on the bed. I looked over and said, "Well, at least I don't need to spend shit at the bar, but I think I need to get a name for the bird, or else I'll become a taunted prick with this guy."


	10. Alcohol did something good

CHAPTER NINE: ALCOHOL DID SOMETHING GOOD

I went to bed and the next morning, I woke up only to see a different Pokémon in my bed. It looked like Midori only when I got out and looked at her, she finally evolved into a Gardevoir. She looked like her mother with the green hair and arms, the white gown, and the red horn in the middle of her chest. That meant that the alcohol did speed up evolution, and I didn't pay squat for it or give them that rare candy stuff, free wonder drugs.

I decided to go make breakfast with whatever we had in the crappy fridge. However, I had to talk over with the desk clerk on the floor which took about 30-55 minutes tops. After bullshitting everything, I got the room, at a moderate price, and started to make breakfast. And just when I started, the hangover ridden bird popped out and then complained, "What the fuck happened?"

I looked over and said, "Well, you loaded yourself on a shit load of alcohol, and now you're paying for it."

"I see why my last trainer never drank that stuff."

"Oh, so you had a trainer?"

"Ha, it took you that long to figure it out. He was a dick in the beginning and I thought it was going great. Then he decided to throw me out because I was not good enough and replaced me with a Goddamn Braxien!"

He kicked a chair in some rage and continued, "Then I was pissed off screaming, punching, and destroying things in the forest to calm me down until I heard a guy say, quote, 'a very pissed off firebird', and then you came into the picture and so."

That explained a lot-ish. "Well, I can guarantee you that you're not getting thrown off this team," as I explain to him, "because of how you fried up the 'gym'. However, if you do some really heavy shit that backfires at me, then you can kiss your ass out the window."

He seemed more relaxed, well somewhat, as I confirmed I won't be throwing him off. I then asked the guy, "Do you have a name by any chance?"

His head turned up and said, "Benzer."

"Benzer, bullshit, that's a cruddy name."

He replied going, "Well, we agree with at least something."

I suggested, "How about Bender instead, since you could bend steel types with your immense heat."

He then started to grow a smile as he thought that idea over, "Yeah, that's not bad, Bender, the Blaziken that bends steel at his mercy. Where did that idea come from?"

"A show called Futurama."

As we finished the talk and food, Midori came out and Bender looked over at her, "(whistle) well, well, look who we have here."

Midori was confused for a bit, then I showed her a mirror and she looked both shocked and happy. Apparently she liked how she looked in the mirror as she checked out her body and the fact we were about at each other heights, well me being three inches higher than her though.

She then said, "Wow, I never thought that that stuff could actually make me evolve faster."

I turned around and said, "Great a new drug that is more efficient than those rare candy things." I then looked at my watch, which I stole, and muttered, "The news should be on by now, let's see if they will be covering the murder."

I went to the television and turned it on toward the news, and they were showing the entire scene. The male reporter then starting talking, " _Yesterday at about 11:35 AM, the famous Ash Ketchum, main champion of Kalos, was murdered as someone pushed him off a balcony in the tree with the balcony railing coming off and crushing him and his Pikachu. Officials say that the DNA tests prove to be positive with the current criminal Franchesa Andoly, who was originally the thief of Cabus town. The motive still remains a mystery, but the current suspect is either currently in Kalos, or has passed to the next town_."

I stood there with the Blaziken making a face that resembled a 'holy shit' face, and Midori just stood there with the happiness dissolving. The news reporter continued, " _If you see this man, along with this Ralts_ ," Midori laughed as they still thought she was a Ralts, " _then please contact your nearest office or officer immediately and a reward of 500k Pokedollars shall be rewarded._ "

I turned it off the TV and sighed, "Well this other worldly experience is getting good, first I get my ass sent to this planet, two I get scared by an oversized butterfly, " Midori cut me off saying, "Butterfee", I rolled my eyes and continued, "three, I play 'Rawhide' with Midori clapping to it and her mother nearly getting me killed, march off to Russian music with her following me, rob a store," then Bender interrupted, "You did what?", I continued, "catch you, have Midori evolve, kill off the Ash, wreck one of his friends at that excuse for a gym, get both of you drunk, evolve Midori again, and now I'm wanted for half a million?"

Midori nodded while Bender sat there in awe with his beak open. I finish my rant with a closer calmly, "Now what the fuck is next, hmm, Ash's humanoid frog friend decides to have me beheaded and stuck to a flag pole?"

I grab myself a sprite and began to drink it. Bender changed the subject, thankfully, by asking, "What is that you're drinking?"

I replied simply, "its sprite, a type of soda from my universe. However, unless one of those world dominating teams decides to create a quantum wormhole to my universe, I'm stuck here without anything."

Midori thought for a minute and then had an idea. She then came up to me and put her hands on the sides of my heads. I was trying to figure out what the fuck she was doing so I asked, "What are you doing", while moving my eyes around to see what she was doing. She then said, "I'm trying to use you as a way to connect our universes together, Bender you can join if you want."

He replied sarcastically, "Oh yeah, I'll come along and get turned into a lab experiment"

I then answered his sarcasm, "As long as we don't wind up in Area 51 then you won't about that."

Bender's sarcastic look went dead and now was in a hint of fear, oddly. Yet he still went in and while Midori held her hands to the sides of my head, Bender put on hand on the right side of my head and the left side of Midori's and then poof.


	11. HELLO BOYS, i'M BACK!

CHAPTER TEN: HELLO BOYS, I'M BACK!

We then appeared in a green bush, with the sounds of people in riots. I looked up and said, "Oh shit, we're in one of those damn anti-racism riots, with the opposite being the confederate supporters."

Midori looked up and saw some of the chaos and Bender was amazed of how the people in my universe acted. I took out a confederate flag picture I drew and waved it up. However, this got attention of a few of the black protesters and they came up to me with a couple of 2x4s. I thought to myself, _'Oh fuck, now what_.'

A voice popped into my head, _'Well, they're people from your universe, YOU deal with them_.'

 _'Ok, I'll try not to get killed_.'

One of the four black guys that were going up to me yelled out, "Hey you!"

I still had my drawing up and then took a hand and pointed to myself signaling 'me?' He then replied, "Yeah, I'm talking to you ya racist."

I then calmly said back, "Racist? Oh no, this is a flag, more specifically Confederate, there are no words so it can't be racist."

The one in the back then called out, "Kid, that flag alone is racist and if you think that we'll tolerate that, then you might as well be dead."

"Well, my friends won't let that kind of event happen."

The woman then said, "Friends?"

"Smith and Weston and me, but of course if that fails you can have a fight with my friends," Now sounding like that witch doctor from 'the princess and the frog', "on the other side."

They laughed saying, "Kid, you got some balls to go against us, now hand over everything or else."

"Go fuck yourselves."

The man in the back with the blue hat then said, "Kid, there's four of us and only you with a .44. We win by a long shot."

The leader of the bunch, being a 6' 2" with a red shirt with the words 'No Nazis, No Confeds' called out to the crowd saying, "Hey Jerome, Carmen!"

Then two men came up from the protest parade and the leader told them something, then they disappeared only to appear behind my lifting me up. I was caught by surprise, literally, and lifted up while I yelled out, "SHIT!"

The leader spoke again, "Now kid, drop your gun and everything else, and we might let you go with only a few hits for your intolerable action."

The guy on my left, named Jerome said in a higher pitched voice, "Yeah kid where are your 'friends from the other side', HAHAHAHA!"

I then said, "You want to meet one of them, ok, hey Bender; here's a fight you might like!"

The leader laughed out, "Who'd ya get, that robot?"

"Nope."

Then the two guys holding me let go as they were grabbed form the back of their shirts and then were hurled over into the other four. And a 6' 3" humanoid bird with a blonde cross on his chest came out from behind me and the little gang went from a laughing joke to a scared as hell look. The blue hat went, "Oh, oh, oh, oh, I ain't messin' with this guy."

The leader turned around and said, "And why not."

"That's a Blaziken man; it's one of those Pokémon things. It can breathe out fire and can fight really damn good. I ain't gonna stick around to get beatin' up by him!" and he took off running away the opposite way.

Bender then looked at me and said, "At least he was smart enough to know not to fight me."

I looked at him and said, "In this universe you're represented as a fictional character, but you are represented as a really good fucking fighter."

"At least if I don't exist, I'm still pretty strong enough to make people run off."

I mumbled to myself, "He took that way better than I expected."

The leader spoke up saying, "Alright enough of this, Jerome hand me the .12 gauge."

"Oh fuck."

"You can say that again kid", and then the blue hatted guy came back, but this time with cards. The leader spoke up saying, "I thought you said you weren't gonna fight it?"

He then replied, "Of course not, I want to get my cards to see if this guy has any more."

Bender then leaned to the side to me whispering, "Are all Pokémon represented as a game?"

I answered back, "Yep."

The leader then loaded the gun and said, "Alright kid, hand everything over and call off bird man, or I'll blow a hole in your stomach."

"Would you like me to get Midori out?"

The blue hat went furiously searching through his cards and then went to shock as he thought of what I think he is seeing, since he probably knows Japanese. He then asked me, "Is it alright if you tell this Midori to not harm me in the process?"

"You know Japanese?"

"Yeah", he muttered in a worried tone.

"Sure."

The leader then laughed out again, "You know what, I want to see this 'Midori'. Is she that little Caterpie, or that even more retarded Metapod? HAHAHA." The group laughed a little, except for the blue hatted man, who said with his lips 'is it a Gardevoir?' I nodded in response as he then started to slowly side walk to the bush. I then called out, "Come on out Midori."

And the laughing died down as Midori came out. Then some of the men of the group started to whistle a little, then the leader spoke up saying, "Nice girl you got there, and better yet, she fits ya well since ya both white, HA."

Then Midori "grabbed" the man and then telepathically said, 'Who said I was a nice girl?'

Fear struck him like a brick as he was eye to eye with her. Then she threw him back in the people and as he tried to get up, Midori hit him in the head with the gun and rained the gun's bullets on the other four heads and they started to run off. The leader then was grabbed by Bender who threw him, and the guy screamed until he crashed inside a dumpster. Bender looked satisfied saying, "Not bad of a fight, or at least scaring a few out of their minds."

The blue hatted man came out and looked slightly scared but Midori didn't do anything since the guy didn't have any weapons and wasn't trying to attack or anything anyway. He went up to them and looked at the cards, looked at Midori and bender, back at the cards, back at them. At the end he said, "Damn, I never thought of seeing a real Pokémon before, much less some of the harder to get ones. I need to take a picture of this, if it is alright?"

We all agreed since no one would believe it anyway, we all stood there as Midori psychically held the guy's phone and the picture clicked. The man then said, "Kid, you're pretty damn lucky to go to a universe were they actually exist. Say," he looked at me examining me. He then said, "Aren't you the missing kid of Georgia?"

I simply replied, "Yeah."

"Wow man, if I could get the luck you did, I would be somebody."

"I'm already well known in that universe for, well kind of a murder."

"Of who?

I hesitated and then said, "Ash."

His eyes went huge and then said, "You actually killed the main kid, Ash Ketchum."

I nodded, and the man went from shock to confusing, and continued, "What season are you set in?"

I explained, "Well, he was in the Kalos and it was past the whole world ending and team flare, and shit, so it would be after XYZ but before Aloha, or in this case, no Aloha."

"Kid, I have a nephew who watched the XYZ and I even saw a couple of the later episodes, and if I'm right, Ash's little frog friend will have you nicely beheaded for killin' his friend."

"That I'm pretty aware of. Luckily I can fool the shitty governments in Kalos, since I forged my name to end with Andolinni, now I need to probably change it to Corleone."

"HA," the man laughed, "You changed your name from ( **Not showing my real name** ) to Andolinni, and now to Corleone. You're takin' the Godfather movie and using it to your advantage, pretty smart."

Bender then stepped into the picture by saying to me, "You're gonna to explain everything when we get back."

"One more question kid, how can be able to understand them?"

I looked over to Midori going, "Oh that, that was givin' to me by Midori over here."

"Oh, yeah I think that is some kind of psychic ability, right, right."

We said our farewells and went back so Midori enacted the, now called, Trans-universal teleportation, and I explained to both of them what happened for about three hours.

Meanwhile in the forest, deep and thick, someone had a poster of me. He was enraged, wanting revenge on me for my murder. He threw a shuriken at the poster shredding it to bits. Thinking in his mind, in heavy anger, ' _He will die painfully_.'


	12. Movin' on

CHAPTER ELEVEN: MOVIN' ON

So after explaining all my previous life shit and also getting my name recharged to Corleone, We then moved out of the city seeing that there was very little to do. We took the northwest after coming in southeast while trying to navigate the paths going north. This led to nearly an hour trying to go about one mile without getting sent to the same area.

At one point I just said, "Fuck it, let's set up shop right here."

And that we did. I went on my laptop and started to go through the music files. Midori looked over and said, "So, this is where you were playing all that music from?"

I looked back and said, "Yeah, some are good, some are modern, some are classics, remakes, foreign-"

"Like that song you were marching too?"

"Yeah, some are offensive, and some are even non-lyrics."

"Example of a non-lyric being?"

"Classical music and some 19th-20th century songs, But, I haven't heard of a modern non-lyric song yet."

She then decided to see through a lot of the songs I had and she didn't seem to find any of her interest, duh, until I scrolled on the song 'stand by your man'. She then asked, "What song is that?"

"That is 'stand by your man', played on by the movie 'The Blues Brothers'."

"Could you play it?"

"Sure", and I clicked the tune. It was connected to the 'Rawhide' song from a few days before, so I edited it to where it'd play:

"I would like to favor the heart section (some dialogue I can't understand)"

Then it play the guitar in rhythm going - - - -

 _"Sometimes it's hard to be a woman,_

 _Giving all your love to just one man,_

 _And if you love him,_

 _Oh be proud of him,_

 _'Cause after all he's just a man,_

 _Stand by your man,_

 _Give him two arms to cling to,_

 _And something warm to come to,_

 _When nights are cold and lonely,_

 _Stand by your man,_

 _And tell the world you love him,_

 _Keep givin' all the love you can,_

 _Stand by your man,_

 _Stand by your man,_

 _And show the world you love him,_

 _Keep givin' all the love you caaaaaan,_

 _Baby,_

 _Stand, byyyyyy, your, maaaaan",_

Then everyone is cheering in the background, yet once I turned off the tune, I notice that Midori is clinging to my left arm. Oh great, I see where she went with this, a romantic song with this picture. I think to myself, ' _Well, I see me becoming a father in a few days._ '

A voice appears goin', ' _Or by today_.'

I move my eyes up and just shake my head with a slight grin.

(Bender's POV)-

* * *

I went off since the Frank and the love dove were looking at that device searching for something. There wasn't too much to do, but at least I trained a bit and kicked down a few trees. After I finished leveling the place, I headed back only to hear some music along with the ending lyrics going, "Keep givin' all the love you caaaaaaan, baby, stand, by, your, maaaaaaan."

I walked up to see that Midori was holding Frank's arm almost as if they were-oh, oh, I see where she wants this to go. I stood by the tent and looked at the two as they then got up.

(Back to my POV)-

* * *

As we both got up we found Bender next to the side of the tent. And he ignited, "Why don't you two just kiss and get it over with since the song is over?"

Midori obviously looked ticked off seeing how Bender saw what she was trying to do. I simply replied, "Patience first, rushing makes worst."

That actually made sense oddly, but it lowered the tenseness by a degree, or at least until a familiar group of assholes decided to show up. And in sync they said, "We're back!"

I looked over to them and groaned, "You fuckers again? Didn't ya learn the first fucking time, or do I have to shoot you again and create", I now said in a crappy Scottish accent similar to Robin William's, "Déjà fucking vu."

The blue hair went, "Oh no, we are way ahead of that."

The red hair went, "Right James, and we have more techniques to get your Pokémon."

The cat went, "And you're gonna lose ya guns as well."

The blue turd went, "Waba waba."

I then replied like a badass, "Really, well then, you'll have to ask yourself one question, do I feel lucky", I point the gun at the man's leg and continued, "Well, do ya punk?"

They looked feared and didn't try to mess with me, so instead I said, "Midori, blast them off."

And Midori shot them with an energy ball and they went flying straight off the path into the prairie where then they got attacked by the wild things in it, the bastards. I told my 'mons while putting my gun away, "Don't mess with me when I start using catchphrases or movie lines."

Midori got the idea, but Bender didn't get it, of course. I then turned on my laptop showing them the "Dirty Harry" movie and the scene where I got it from. It made sense to Bender, as I showed both of them the first scene with it and the last.

It was 12:54PM when I checked my laptop's clock, so I decided, "Well, since we are a couple miles from the town, and there is little to do, how 'bout we go over back to my world?"

Bender looked ready, but Midori didn't seem to dwell well on it and answered, "Are you sure on that, I mean, a group of people did try to shoot your stomach and rob you?"

I replied, "I didn't say let's go to Chicago or Detroit in the poor areas, but somewhere that is more, friendlier?"

"Like?"

"Well, there is New York, but there is shit over there too. Can't really go to a foreign country, at least anything that isn't English speaking, and can't go to Africa period because of all the fightin', rape, warlords, and shit like that."

Now that I just shrunk the idea, we all decided to appear 10 miles north of the riot area, since there wasn't a riot goin' on anyway. Once we popped up, we looked around a bit and saw that the place we appeared was, bad. We went with plan B and went to New York.

New York wasn't as bad as I thought, however, I didn't trust a lot of the alley ridden people who had sharp knives. Skipping over, some places where interesting, there was the Empire State building, that building with the chrome top, Statue of liberty, and the One World Trade Center.

Now, I only attracted a few people seeing as none of them really gave a damn about a bird man or a white, floating woman. I decided to put Bender in his ball until I got a good position on Wall Street. We walked in and nobody really cared since they were looking at their stock and their money. Midori then asked, "Is this what people do all day in your world?"

I then answered back while point to the stocks, "Well not everyone, but if you're a wealthy business man with a shit ton of cash, then this is just about what you do all day, I think."

We walked up to the Dow Jones and I showed +255.24 as the current total. I said, "Well, the Dow is having a good day today."

Midori then looked to me saying, "How do you know?"

"If the number has a plus, it's up, if it has a minus, like that one there, then it's down."

I took nearly 20 minutes explaining the stock process while then ending it saying, "Alright let's get out before we start buying stock and it crashes."

Midori giggled and we left the building, only to bump a guy wearing your typical grey suit with a black briefcase. He sounded annoyed, remarking, "Watch were the hell you're going kid."

I jerked back and said, "Sorry, just walking through."

As then man wiped off something, he looked up and took a look at Midori and said, "What the fuck is that?", as he pointed at her.

Midori crossed her arms and glared at the man, as I came into the picture by saying, "She is a who, not a what. It's like me referring you briefcase as a who not a what."

This, luckily, confused the man and he just turned around going into the building, while shaking his head. I looked at Midori and we continued to walk down the street. At around 4:35PM, we went back to the tent. Outside the entrance to the tent, I released Bender out and he started up the conversation by asking, "So did the trip go well, or did you get stuck with muggers?"

I responded in a straight tone, "No, but there was a prick somewhere at the end of the Wall Street visit."

Bender looked up and then turned around into the forest. For a second there I thought he left me and Midori alone on purpose, or he was not in the mood today, which is still good. Nevertheless, I wasn't gonna sit around doing blank, so I decided to go look for some firewood. Now, I left Midori in charge so I wouldn't have to have a lovey-dovey moment, again, not saying it's bad, but not great if it's all the time.

As I went into the forest, I looked at the trees for any dead branches. I wandered into an area where I see some pieces of paper. I grabbed a piece with a partial word of "rankc". I thought it was a misspelled "ranks"; however, when I picked up another it said 'Andoliny wanted for" and I found another piece with a circle on the part "… (Murder) of Ash Ketchum…" and now started to panic a little looking back and forth putting 2 and 2 together.

I try to calm myself down going, "It's some crazy guy, it's just some crazy guy with no job, maybe a drunken bartender."

I continued ruffling through the forest, only to find broken trees, smashed up rocks, and a wooden dummy with my face on it. Now I was shocked to hell. I began to walk back, then someone said, "Frank?"

I spun around with a heart attack going, "Damn it Midori, was that fucking necessary?", whisper screaming just in case there was somebody out there.

She replied, "No, but I sensed something was frightening you so I decided to come over."

"Well, at least you're nice enough for that."

She blushed a bit to my response. I looked at the debris field and asked Midori, "Now you watch those Pokémon documentaries, what could create all of this, emm, destruction?"

She looked around for a bit and said, "Well, it was caused by a water attack move. Definitely a solid water object, along with some dark pulses…"

I thought to myself, ' _Oh, don't say it_ ', now cringing.

"…It would be a, Greninja."

' _My fucking luck._ '

She looked at me and said, "I think you may have officially pissed off someone."

I then stared at her with a shocked and pissed look, "Well, I don't think that the Tasmanian devil decided to take some posters of me along with his friend the werewolf and have a kill fest. Of course I pissed off Ash's fucking frog friend, of course!", I threw my hands in the air screaming as I said that last part. All hell has just been unleashed onto me.


	13. The third party has arrived

CHAPTER TWELVE: THE THIRD PARTY HAS ARIVED

After the gut-cleaning, since I shit myself really good when I had to go, we slept in, and woke up the next morning to see those fucking asswipes chant their stupid motto again.

I get out and say, "Are you people this stubborn?"

The woman replies, "Ha, after you killed the twerp we needed someone else to follow…"

"…And your that someone else", finished the man.

I sighed and said, "At least you made it more interesting by finally putting on some bullet proof armor."

The cat smiled and said, "We thought those bullet wounds were, eh, too severe, so we decided to use some more rational tactics."

"Like sitting in the corner?"

"Yeah, we did that for… why you little…"

"Yeah, yeah, anyway", I pulled out my .44 and fired four separate bullets into their feet, which they didn't cover. I looked them wallow in pain and smirked, "Bulletproof my ass; you don't even wear good boots."

Midori then came out and said, "How many of those bullets do you have left?"

I looked at what I had and replied, "Seven, why?"

She pointed off in the distance where some people in orange jumpsuits and visors appeared with a fuck ton of 'mons. I then whispered toward Midori, "Wake up Bender, and pack up the tent quickly."

Midori went into the tent and threw a rock at Bender, which woke him up and pissed him off, and she then packed up the tent. Now Bender would start asking what's going on, but before he did, he saw the group coming at us. He then went into a worried state and I put him in his ball, then we teleported out'a there.

Where we teleported was at random, like everything else in my new life, my luck, but there was some reward for that since I found a Zorua sitting under the tree. A little dog like creature with a tuff of red hair on its head, with a black body, just sat there looking at us.

It tilted its head and asked, "Who are you?"

I looked at her, by the things voice, and responded, "I am a very troubled American Rebel, with a two 'mons, a .44, a laptop full of scenes, lines, movies, and music, who is also getting chased by a fuck ton of people and a killer frog humanoid."

Bender stood in confusion, Midori held in a laugh, and the Zorua just sat there confused as all hell. I then continued, "I also understand what you're saying thanks to Midori's help here."

Midori beamed with pride at that point, and I looked back to the pup, I think, and asked her, "Would you like to come along with us on this crazy train. Or do you have any parents I should be scared of", slightly worried at that last part remembering Midori's mother.

The Zorua shook her head saying, "I don't have any parents since they disappeared about three weeks ago."

I whispered to myself, "Oh thank God."

I continued to the Zorua by saying, "What's your name?"

"Heleva."

Arguing over that kind of name didn't work well, so we kept it there and I caught Heleva. We then continued onward down to the next town called Mallowver. This place was like Cabus, and definitely similar. It was a small town, hotel, store, shit, and police, and Midori trying to keep her sanity intact. I kept my sanity in one piece as well because I didn't want to attract any, em, attention.

We walked by the store with Midori telling me, "Don't think about it", I pulled off my eyes from the mega stones they were selling.

We got to the hotel and the clerk looked up to see me and Midori. He greeted us, "Welcome to Mallowver Hotel, how may I be of assistance?"

I looked at him saying, "Well, a room possibly?"

"Alright, name of?"

"Francesco Corleone."

"Alright", he replied as he then typed it all up as oddly as anything since he didn't have any suspicion about me, good.

He handed me the room key and instructed, "Your room 32 on the third floor."

"Doomo."

And we continued walking to the room and it was way better than the Cabus room since it was a lot larger, TV, table, couch 'n chair, a kitchen, and a nice window stretching from one wall to the other. There were only two bedrooms. Me and Midori would be in one, while Bender can be in the other room with Heleva sleeping in the second bed in that room.

Before doing so, I looked at the clock and the time only said 9:55 PM. I took the other two out of there balls and sat down at the kitchen table with my laptop open. Bender walked behind me trying to find what I was doing, only to see me on YouTube looking up a George Carlin video about driving. He then asked, "You seriously watch this?"

I looked to my side saying, "Well, if there is someone here that's as good as this guy, then I would be seeing that guy. Him however, is pretty damn hilarious."

I turned on the video as it began with the guy going:

" _ **There's a lot of shit you have to put up with when you're driving, like red lights.**_ "

He looked up simulating there are red lights on the ceiling.

" _ **When did this bullshit start happening? I only noticed them like three months ago. I stopped for them for a week, and didn't like it, now *phfffuuuuu* I'm gone**_!"

I paused the video and skipped ahead while saying, "There is a scene which I should pull on one of those cloned officers."

I stopped at the right mark as the man goes:

 _ **"-policemen respect strength. So while he is writing up the ticket, you gotta shower him a lot of bad looks.**_ "

He then makes some looks, including one where he picks his nose and throws it at the officer, which always gets me and caused bender to laugh a bit too.

" _ **And then when he's almost done writing, you reach over and GRAB the ticket from him, and say you're gonna check it over for mistakes."**_

He then looks at the "ticket" and continues:

" _ **And when you're finished reading, you crumple it up and throw it to his feet and say 'fuck you and your ticket too'**_ ", the crowd went roaring in laughter and me and Bender going as well.

" _ **You asshole in a hat. Can't you see I have enough garbage on the floor of my car, only to be given another worthless piece of paper from the state? I got eight 'a nine of them fuckin' things floatin' in here.**_ "

We began to laugh at this, even Midori joined in a bit.

 _ **"Say, don't I pay your salary? They are always interested in the state budget.**_

 _ **You're a public servant; go get me a glass of water."**_

He then used his elbow like there was someone behind him and hit against him.

" _ **You pinheaded prick. You're holding me up jack, people are waiting for me at a party, I got a truck full of heroin, get the fuck out 'a my way, get the fuck out 'a my way.**_ "

We all exploded in laughter with even Heleva joining in. I then closed the video and Bender slowly regained control and said, "Ok… That guy is pretty damn funny I'll admit it."

I turned around saying, "This guy is from my universe, so if I use his act, nobody would know where it came from and I could become a well-known comedian."

Midori chimed in saying, "You use lines, scenes, why not just simply use quotes?"

"I do that too", I then replied and Midori shook her head leaving. The time after about an hour of jokes, music, and a couple of drinks, which I stole, it was 11:04 PM. Midori came into the Kitchen and asked, "Aren't you going to bed yet?"

I looked up and said, "Well, not yet, why?"

"Well, first off its late and two…"

I cut her off saying, "You want me to be in bed with you, eh?"

She blushed and nodded. I then turned off my laptop and said, "Well, I'll go to bed, what could happen."

She responded, in a new tone, "I can think of something."

I thought to myself, ' _Oh shit; here we go again with this scenario'_.

I walked over to the room's door, and before I entered, Midori spun me around to her and kissed me on the lips. Well, this is getting interesting; my whole entire history in this world is crashing like a meteorite.

Once she pulled back, she was in a state of some shock, similar to me, and she hoped it didn't do anything she may regret. I looked at her and said, "It's a damn good thing you ain't drunk."

She giggled to that, and the fire dick came out of the other bedroom door going, "You sure on that?"

Midori, really ticked off, then opened the door and slammed it hard on Bender's claw, making him shaking it in pain while cursing, "Fucking hell, ow, ow, (some wincing) maybe not the best move."

She then told him, "You think it was good?"

"Well, I was showing Heleva the two of you kissing and she got a kick out 'a that."

"Oh really", she took one of my shoes and swung it right into Bender's ass, knocking him over. She then continued, "Now you got a kick as well", she replied smugly. We continued on to the room while Bender mumbled something as he went to his bed.

(Third/first person style POV)-

* * *

Running through the forest, a humanoid is trying to find my whereabouts. He has no idea I changed my name and kept looking for an Andoly. He was getting more violent every time he misses my presence. Having to resort to the city, he finds the old gym one of his friends.

He busts in, looking for his old friend. Seeing the little orange mouse like creature waiting for his trainer, he walks up and asks him, "I don't have the patience to say hello at this point, have you seen a man name Francesa Andoly?"

The mouse replies, "Oh, did he have a Gardevoir with him?"

"A Gardevoir, eh, well did he look like this?"

He showed his mouse friend a picture with my picture on it along with a picture of Midori as a Ralts. The Mouse nodded saying, "He came in here a couple of days ago and won the battle against Clemont."

The Mysterious character moved out fast with rage, almost breaking the glass doors. His thoughts roared one sentence, ' _KILL HIM!_ '


	14. Go number two, in badges that is

CHAPTER TWELVE: GO NUMBER TWO, IN BADGES THAT IS

Getting a weird feeling of this, as I wake up the next morning, I see Midori holding onto me; only I got out of bed without her waking up. Proceeding to the kitchen, I notice that Bender was already there waiting for me to do something. What he wanted, God only knew.

I walk up to him and he goes, "Anything interesting happen besides you two falling asleep?", as he grinned at that. I saw the idea he was getting in his damn head and I replied to the bastard, "We didn't have any sex if that is what you were referring too. Now shut up and I'll go get some breakfast."

After about 5 minutes, Heleva came out and greeted everyone with joy, "Morning!"

We both looked in her direction and said, "Morning."

She looked at me and said, "Anything happen?"

I now looked at her saying, "With what?"

"You and Midori."

I now look at Bender's direction and gave him the finger, while telling Heleva, "No, we just went to sleep, God what is it with everyone today?"

Now Midori got out, and I rolled my eyes up and went back to my eggs. She then cheered, "Morning Frank."

I responded back in a less stressed tone, "Morning Midori."

After about an hour of everyone here blabbering, whacking Bender over his obnoxious comments, and getting the fuck out of the hotel, we got back onto the road and continued onward. After about three hours of walking, we encountered the group of retarded idiots who, not only fail miserably and get themselves shoved into the hospital, but now come into the picture with their hot air balloon.

I look at these moronic asses and yell in their direction, "Didn't you assholes learn the last three fucking times? Or are you mentally retarded?"

They screamed back, "We are not retarded!"

"Then you must be insane!"

"We are not insane either!"

I turn around to Heleva and Midori, "Mix those energy balls and blast these pricks out 'a the way."

And the group blasted off, shit like that, we walked on, and said after the clock hit about 3:51 PM, "Alright, let's set up a camp and start getting some food in order, since I got some from the store."

Midori shot a look at me, knowing I stole that as well, yet went with it anyway. I went off trying to find some little defenseless Pokémon bastards to capture, while my 'mons were doing whatever the fuck they do with their spare time.

My search was fruitless, or at least boring, until I came across a really totaled area. Thoughts started to zoom through my head as I knew that it, the damn Greninja character, had been here, or at least before the first area I looked at. Moving onward I see a… body.

The body is dead wolf, or at least by the looks of it. I took out my 'Dex to see what it was, and it registered as a Ninetails. The body is only four, maybe five days old. It was brutally ripped open, revealing its organs and insides, which at some point I looked away before I fainted, and then I usually stopped it by singing or humming a tune.

Crossing over the dead carcass was another one, a Servine, and one more being, what apparently was, a Machoke. If this is what that frogman can do, God only knows what it could do to me.

After the Freddy Kruger/IT experience, I decided to head back and help Bender and Midori with the site 'n shit. Then we went to bed, tad bit of romance, yadda yadda, next morning, we got up, ate food, moved on and skipping ahead of time, we bumped into another gym leading asshole.

This woman was a blonde in white clothing, wearing a white helmet with her hair going out of it, while apparently on roller skates. I take one look at her and tell her, "The roller rink is that way", while pointing in the opposite direction where I came from. She shook her head smiling saying, "I was originally going to Luminose city for a few things, but if you want I could battle you out."

I told her, "Well, if my memory, *and TV memory*, serves right you're a gym leader, correct?"

She nodded and released her blue, dog Lucario friend out and I stood there going, "I'm gonna throw Midori against a three foot fucking tall mutt? Ha, this will be easy."

The woman threw her comment going, "Oh really?"

The mutt said, "I'll win."

I told the mutt, "You won't win, I'll guarantee that."

Both of the challenging idiots stood there confused, then the woman asked, "Did you actually understand what Lucario was saying?"

"Well, duh, Midori here gave me that ability; I'm just saying it to his face saying he ain't gonna win against an American Rebel!"

They stood there confused and we did the fight, skipping ahead, and the woman called out the blue mutt and I brought out Heleva.

She told the mutt, "Bone rush!"

The Lucario made a bone sword and Heleva ducked, only then she sat there rolling back and forth on the ground and I said, "Uh, use retardation?"

She was just rolling there as everyone didn't get where this was going, then she shot a dark energy ball right into the Lucario's genitals. I cringed, Midori even cringed, and the leader yelled, "Are you even controlling your Pokémon?!"

I replied, "To be honest, I didn't know what she was doing. However, she didn't have to shoot it right there", and she returned the mutt to bring out a Bisharp. I looked up and groaned, "Another iron bishop?"

I brought Heleva back and threw Midori into the ring. The Bisharp launched off a dark energy beam which directly hit Midori while she tried something like that. She fired an energy sphere at it only for it to dodge, and me cursing under my breath every miss. About two minutes of Matrix style dodging, the damn axe headed 'mon knocked out Midori.

I then pulled out Bender and told him to pick up Midori and put her over here. He did so and I threw him into the damn picture. And the woman returned her Bisharp for a ferret. I point my phone at the thing, take a picture, scanned it, and this "Mienshao" apparently was already in attack position.

Fight started, and after two minutes of me screaming at Bender to stop blow torching me and blow torch the ferret, he got lucky and directly hit the bow of the thing. The woman replied, "You're lucky my last one is a Bisharp."

"Well, I think it is really fried unless your bishop can turn Bender into KFC."

"KFC?" she tilted her head trying to understand what that meant.

I replied with an annoyed sigh going, "It means Kentucky Fried Chicken, *you blonde haired bitch*", mumbling the last part so that her Pokémon didn't her it or else I would be number four in the fight. Anyways, Bender melted the next opponent with a series of "Photo torpedoes" and "Flame disruptors".

I received the badge, shook hands, and when she marched away to the city, I looked back and did the finger at her, only for the Lucario to see it and him screaming, "You prick!"

I did that same thing in his direction and he turned around nicely pissed. Midori looked at me and said, "You really need to stop irritating people."

I looked back and then looked at Midori saying, "He's not a person, he's a mutt."

Midori saw the flaw and shook her head grinning. We stopped for the night, and went to sleep in the tent aside the dirt path.

(The Greninja's POV)

* * *

Running through the forests, I try to find that damn murderer. He apparently has gone done a couple of ways threw the towns. I resided in the Mallowver town for a bit, and continued onward.

Within about five miles, I ran into one of Ash's gym leader opponents. I asked Lucario, "Did you happen to see a man like this?"

He then replied, "Yeah the guy did a middle finger at both of us, only I saw him do it."

His trainer, Korrina, then asked, "Let me see that", and then her faced went pale going, "Oh my—that was the murder of Ash we fought against?"

This made Lucario shocked way high knowing what happened earlier. I kept on running forward, mentally screaming, ' _Where are you, you son of a bitch_!'


	15. Here's froggy!

CHAPTER THIRTEEN: HERE'S FROGGY!

Now, as I seem to become the main character of this damn place, guess who came the fifth fucking time? Those team rocket bastards. "Prepare for-"

I popped out of the tent screaming at the top of my lungs, "WILL YOU PLEASE…SHUT…THE…FUCK…UP!?"

The woman went, "Can't we do anything?"

"Yeah, you can play dead, *after I shoot you between the eyes*."

The blue blob had a sweat drop appear on the side of his head and started talking to the cat who then yelled out, "RUN!"

They ran off, when Midori woke up and then mumbled, "What happened?"

I turned around looking at my gun, being very pissed, "Oh, the usual shit."

We then got all the gear packed up and started to move ahead. Midori asked me a question that she assumed I would've screamed at in the beginning, "Um, Frank?"

I looked straight ahead going, "Yes, Midori?"

"Is it possible to um…"

"To?"

"To go…"

She was stuttering a bit, but I helped her along going, "To go where?"

"T-to g-go farther than where we are?"

"Farther, maybe with teleportation, but-", I then thought and continued, "You mean that kind of farther."

She nodded; all I could do was shake my head while telling her, "To be honest I'm not against it, since technically it isn't against the Bible as Pokémon don't really count as animals. But, people around here are, ahem, anti-poképhile if I'm correct?"

She then turned to me going, "Actually, in Kalos they aren't."

"Oh good, then I'm not against it, although Bender will be taunting us for God knows how long."

"Then he will be having one hell of a sore hand/foot."

I agreed with that idea, but I have no idea what the hell could even happen in THAT kind of situation. However, with only a slight moment to respond, a projectile flew right between me and Midori, missing my ear by less than one millimeter. It rammed into a tree and cut it down. I stood there in awe with my mouth open. Midori turned around and she went into dead fear.

I then looked to Midori going, "Sh-sh-should I b-be wor-worried a-about something?"

Her head nodded frantically as she was stuck in some encircling fear. I then heard a yell going, "You murderer!"

My day was really fucked up, and it was probably going to be my last. It was him alright, Ash's Greninja standing right there only about 20 feet away. He looked so pissed that it make Gordon Ramsey looked very calm when he was screaming bloody murder.

He stood there; we looked at each other form the distance we were at, then he yelled out, "You murdered my friend, and you gotten away with it long enough! I will kill you like you killed Ash, and I'll also take your little romantic as well!"

Me and Midori both shit ourselves, yet I then replied strangely calm, "And how do you plan to do that?"

"My own way…", and he readied what was a dark energy beam. I looked to Midori going, "Well, we're boned."

Yet before we were shot, Midori transported me out 'a the way, and yelled at the damn frog, "You're going to have to kill me first…", and then she was hit way too damn hard with the energy blast. I looked with bugling eyes going, "HOLY SHIT!"

After the blast, I assumed Midori was then, dead. The Greninja walked over to her body and turned facing me saying, "Now, its, YOUR TURN", and he prepared another one of those beams.

"Living hell", I then looked away from my final doom, when I hear a rustle coming from the bush behind me, out coming, Heleva.

She jumped right in front of the beam and I ducked down; she then was hit with almost 60% of all that energy, not knowing how she even survived that as I looked up. She glowed way up as she evolved into a humanoid wolf creature. She was at least Midori's height, with claws, a huge hair bundle behind, she evolved into a *checking the 'Dex* Zoroark.

She then fired a dark energy ball directly at the Greninja, who also fired the same thing and both collided creating one enormous dust cloud. I ran my ass off in the opposite direction, hoping to avoid the frog. Yet as soon as I stopped by a tree, still in dust, a sharp object was put to my throat, and I knew who it was.

The Frogman said, "You thought I would let you get away with that escape and your little murder that easily? Now it's time to pay the price."

I tried to grab my knife I had in my knife sheath, but it wasn't there. Midori must've token it out and—that meant she wasn't dead. My theory was right, when a rock went directly into his head knocking him over, and I escaped out. Then a blade went out of his left chest, going straight through his heart, and he screamed out, "AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!"

He fell over on the ground bleeding profusely, trying to grasp a breath, yet failing every time. And in his last breath he said, "You…You murdered my friend…."

I walked over his body and then replied in my "Dirty Harry" voice, "Well, at least this time, I got the gun and also", cocking my gun, "I got my wife", I then pulled the trigger, blowing out a good section of his back brains on the ground and leaving a clean hole in the front head. The Greninja's body laid there as a dead corpse while still bleeding out.

Midori came up to me, in pain from the event, and changed the mood as she said with an "interesting" smile, "So, you do consider me as your wife?"

I nodded looking away from the frogman's dead, bleeding body, answering, "To be as honest as possible, I pretty much say that is what it is."

"And I can't wait to see what the kids would look like", said a voice in the distance. We spun around to see Bender with Heleva with their arms behind their backs. I looked at the two and replied, "Look who the fuck you're talking too."

Then they begin to get annoyed and blushed at the same time as I said, "This is one hell of an adventure that almost everybody would love to go on."

I held my laugh; we all healed up, and continued our current path, forward.


	16. Epilouge

CHAPTER FOURTEEN: EPILOUGE

Now, after the attack, me and Midori, well, got "married" and had a Ralts named Edward. Now I didn't say that anybody approved it since when I went to see my parents in my universe and explained that there grandson was a Pokémon, they were furious as all hell. I didn't give a damn really, so I stayed in this world for basically the remainder of my life.

Bender and Heleva have also gotten children as a Torchic and a Zorua, the little bird being the female and the Zorua being male, so basically the opposite genders of their parents.

As for my traveling, my infamous record started to fade bit by bit every month as no one could even locate where I was. So far, I changed my name to Francesco Sicily, yet nobody knew any of the last names since they were one time encounters, thank God.

Another thing I got on my little journey was a Snivy, now a Serperior, a Wartortle, and finishing off with including my own son. Right now he is a Kirlia, but he'll get that Gallade upgrade soon.

And, despite being hunted by that Greninja, the police, those Rocket and Flame fuckers, and wanted in three regions, I never felt any kind of remorse from that murder of Ash. Maybe, it was finally time for that kid to get what he needed since everyone else couldn't lay a single finger on him. But, as I begin to close my laptop, writing up the last entry of my logs before it becomes its own history, Midori came into the room with that damn devilish smile, "Are coming to bed or what?"

I smirked and turned around, only replying, "Yes dear, I'm coming."

Well, better close it up, who knows what may happen.


	17. My relatives arrive

**As a way for me to celebrate my one month being here, and this being a first story, I decided to create two new chapters for it. Also you'll need to have read "Aloha to Me" and the beginning of "The ItalyDex" to understand where this story is set.**

* * *

CHAPTER FIFTEEN:

I rub my hands on my head knowing that Midori did some real shit behind my back, but then again it's not new, I done shit behind my own family's back and some times I would get it from my in-law. I get up from the chair from my computer with the 'Dex and look at the time. It's only ten minutes until Midori goes and picks up my parents.

Me, Edward, and Siliveisa don't have good relations with my father since I married an "animal", Edward is a hybrid, and Siliveisa is a frog. My mother I can tolerate since she isn't as hard hearted. I walked out of the room with a bottle of wine and Bender then comes from the left asking, "Well Frank, your relatives are visiting for a week?"

I made a disgusted look and said, "I wish, Midori convinced my parents to stay here for a month."

"Yeah, you're fucked."

"You think?"

Bender then put a claw behind his back and said, "Well, one thing that may make this worse is that Arenmo and Rose might be, well, getting more romantic."

I look him and begin to laugh, "You think I have problem with that? Edward married someone who tried to kill me. I have no problems with my daughter marrying your son."

Bender breathed out in relief, and as we walked back to see Midori appear with my father and mother and two suitcases. I make a Fred Sanford style disgust face and think, ' _Why Midori, why a month?_ '

My father looked slightly irritated and said, "Hello Frank, if that's what you're called still."

I told him, "I changed my name to Francesco Italy. You don't like it, oh well."

"And where will we be staying?"

I make a hand gesture, "Follow me."

I take the cases while Bender and Midori walk beside me. Midori wasn't too comfortable with my father walking behind her, and she asked, in Pokémon talk, "Frank, should we explain to everyone about your parents."

I look behind as Mom and Dad try to figure out what Midori said, then I told her, "As long as they don't do something fucking stupid, we're fine."

My father shot back, "Hey, don't talk like that at us."

I tell him, "It's my lab, my rules."

He wasn't happy how I talk usually because I was supposed to show respect. How can you show respect to your parents if they can't even acknowledge that you're married. I lead them to a room and tell them, "Here's where you can stay for the next whenever the hell. Don't go to the nature room, stay away from the desk when Me, Midori, Bender, or Edward are talking with people, don't engage in any activity with the Sylveon, and please, please, don't try to fuck things up."

I sounded like I was begging at the end, but I shook my head and told Midori as she walked with me down the hall, "Do you think that they can get along here?"

Midori pretended to think and said, "No, not really."

"Well, maybe they'll see this place sucks and they will just leave."

"I convinced them to stay for at least a week, if they don't like it, they can go by the time a week's up.

I laughed, "Midori, I love you and I understand my relations with my parents is like North Korea with America, but I really doubt they'll stay here for that long."

Midori just turned around to the front of the lab and said, "Then we'll see if they can survive in this world for just a week."

I mumbled to myself, "Unlikely."

Three hours later, I walk down through the hall to the nature room to see if the beenazis and pidgemericans are at it again. I don't see any fighting believe it or not. This is probably the first time I actually liked how Catherine kept her Pacifist, hippy ways to the room as there is no war. I see Catherine playing with a Bayleef, one that was abandoned, and I walked in and asked Catherine, "Oh look, you're playing with the dinoweed; anyways your grandparents arrived so don't do any stupid shit around them."

Catherine looked at me with a face saying "are you serious" and said, "Dad, I'm sure you could be better in your manners and you can trust me since I'm not like you."

I looked at her saying, "Just because I pop a bullet into some Pokémon's head doesn't mean I'm heartless."

The Bayleef looked aghast and stuttered, "You k-killed P-p-Pokémon?"

I nodded saying, "Yeah, only if they're annoying."

Then the Bayleef fainted and I told Catherine, "Well, I'll go inform Edward on the situation, unless he knows by now."

Catherine just face palmed herself and said, "Can you please not use violence as the first option?"

I look around and say, "Have you seen the fucking shit I've been dealing with? First my parents come to visit, then you're lecturing me on my violence, what's number three?"

I hear yelling in the back as Midori and Bender and dragging Edward screaming the direction down the hall. I sprinted to the exit of the room and asked Midori, "What the hell's going on?"

Midori said, "Your father and Edward got into another fight."

Edward screamed, "I'm getting sick of him calling me an animal hybrid!"

All I did was pat him on the shoulder and say, "I got used to it, he's been screaming that at me for years."

Me and Bender walked Edward to calm down in the battle arena. Usually when Edward gets pissed at something, I throw Bender against him, and to make it more interesting, I mega evolve both of them. It's always a satisfying fight, but sometime sit would go three ways as Siliveisa or Rose would join. Once there were four ways and Edward was pinned against three different opponents. Amazingly, he took out all three, but Kevanin as a Froakie fired one water gun at the back of Edward's head and the son beat his father.

We began as I evolved the two fighting types and I screamed out, "FIGHT!"

Edward took the first move and jumped forward with his arm blade inward, Bender took the advantage and hyper kicked directly it Edward's legs making him spin. Then Bender body slammed down, but Edward teleported out of the way making Bender's slam a counterattack. As I watch the two Pokémon fight, I see Midori enter with my father also coming in. I rolled my eyes and said, "And, what are you doing. This is no place for a 60+ year old man to hang around."

My father started, "First off, why the hell are they fighting?"

"To calm down Edward after you and him were fighting."

My father shook his head and continued, "Second, why won't you marry a real woman, that thing isn't a woman."

I tell him calmly, "She's as real of a woman as I'm right now a—SHIT!"

I yelled as Bender went flying into the wall, knocked out. I looked up saying, "Edward, fling him into other walls, will ya?"

Edward teleported over saying, "Sorry, fighting isn't precise ya know."

I continued, "Anyways, Midori is as real of a woman as I'm right now a gym leader and I can make tens of millions a year while you make… what, maybe a couple ten thousand."

My father stood there still slightly ticked off and said, "You could've had a better life."

I look at him saying, "This is way better than any life I could get; fine-ish family, money coming out my ass, some fame which means shit to me, and I run a gym and lab. I think I won."

I left with a smug grin on my face with my father still slightly infuriated. Midori then told him, "Well, your son just owned you and beat your logic."

He told her, "Shut the hell up, you damn animal."

Edward walked up and threatened, "How about you leave and your face doesn't get scarred?"

My father left shaking his head and went back to his room. I walked to the front of the lab and found Rose and Heleva talking with Mom. I decided to go back to the 'Dex since there is really nothing left to do, except…

"Hey dumbass."

Siliveisa came up, and I told her like those damn recordings, "I'm sorry, but the 'dumbass' you are currently asking for is going back to work on his ItalyDex. Please try again when I'm not in the room, and leave a message after the beep, BEEEP."

Siliveisa rolled her eyes and grabbed the back of my shirt saying, "I want to know why the fuck your father is here."

"Talk to Midori, it was her plan."

Siliveisa let go of my shirt and walked off, only stopping, asking, "And where is she?"

I said, "The battle arena, if not there, then ask Bender, Edward, or even my father, if he's somewhat communicable."

She nodded and walked off to the arena. I just went into my 'Dexs room and began work thinking, "How bad could it possibly be?"

(Time skip 3 days)

Oh the pain, as Dr. Smith would say. It has been so fucking annoying as my parents have been turning my lab life upside down. Every time I would tell the "war" room to quiet down after firing numerous shots into the ceiling, my father and Catherine come screaming how I should stop using automatic weapons. Now, I only have an M4A4 and two AK-47s, unfortunately Kevanin and Arenmo took one of the AKs and broke the main trigger piece.

I wake up two hours later than usual, only to see an empty bed and the clock reading 10:32 AM. I haven't woken up this late in a long while. I get dressed, put on my Arcanine fur coat, my Umbreon fur hat, my three mega evolve gems, my Z-crystal, and my black sneakers. I get out of my room and see that there are two kids waiting for their Pokémon.

I walk out and say, "Welcome to my lab, if you want a Pokémon, you'll have to wait until I can get three without being killed."

The two kids, on being a girl and the other a boy, looked at each other weirdly. I said, "Chottomatte."

I went to the nature room and said, "Three Pokémon who want to leave follow me please."

And what followed were a Riolu, the Bayleef, and a Snivy. I came back and said, "Here are three, pick them out."

The girl chose the Snivy and the boy chose the Bayleef. The Riolu didn't look happy and I told her, "Come down, what's the worst that could happen?"

The Riolu said, "You shooting me."

I told her, "Don't mess with me and that won't happen."

The kids looked at me odd and I told them, "Oh right, here are some PokéDexes, your ID for them, and now you may go and become, whatever you want to be."

As the two kids left, the girl asked, "Is it true that you're married to a Pokémon?"

I said, "Yeah, why?"

She just smiled and said, "Just wondering."

I shook my head and lead the Riolu back the nature room which already broke out a small fight. I pulled out my M4A4 again and fired into the dirt saying, "What the fuck is the problem now?"

A Pidgeotto yelled, "The Beedrills are on our territory!"

A Beedrill yelled, "And you're on ours!"

I yelled, "And you're in my lab which means I own all the territory here, so I'm being nice enough you're getting your own fucking territory. Now, shut up and act like grown Pokémon. Damn."

I walked back and put the gun away, only for Catherine and Midori to appear, with Catherine saying, "And here's Dad, shooting up the place again."

I told her, "Now, now, it was only three bullets. Besides, they need to be taught not to fight over land, so that's where you come in."

Midori said, "Well, we're not here to discuss your habits on Pokémon care. I was going to say that Arenmo…"

I finished, "is getting romantic with Rose, I know."

Midori however said, "that and also had sex with her."

I made a strange face and said, "Ok, when should we make a wedding for them?"

"They asked for tonight."

I laughed and said, "Ha, ok where?"

Midori made a grin and said, "In one of your world's chapels."

I made a "WTF" face and said, "Their serious?"

She nodded her head. I threw my hands in the air and said, "Alright, maybe when a chapel closes and there's no one in there, then I don't see why not."

She went away to the front, but I asked her, "Does Bender and Heleva know this?"

She stopped and had a sweat drop appear which meant she didn't tell them. She only said, "I…haven't told them yet."

I made a chuckle and just went to the 'Dex room, and before I entered, Midori said, "I also decided to have the 'Delphox on the Roof' play a tune at their wedding."

I held my hand saying, "Don't tell me, I want to hear it for myself."

She smiled and we went to our work areas.


	18. Another marriage

CHAPTER SIXTEEN:

I began planning for the wedding tonight as Arenmo and Rose went and did it first, then they get married. They're basically doing what Edward and Siliveisa did, oh well. Anyway, I got a chapel rented for the night, between 11:00 PM to 2:00 AM and once Midori told Bender and Heleva about this, they had 20 different emotions displaying at once. Now they did allow it, and Bender started slapping himself over the fact that me and him are about to become brother-in-laws.

After I got the priest on the specified church to agree to the conditions, I walked out of the room and said, "So, Edward's married, Rose is going to be married, who in God's name is Catherine going to marry?"

I think back multiple times before and realize something, her and Magnus were getting closer, well Catherine gets closer to him, and she does seem to show more affection to him, but he doesn't realize that. Oh well, two likes make a good marriage, well, ok, me and Midori are an exception but still.

It was 10:35 PM and I see Rose, Midori, Arenmo, Bender, Heleva, and Edward in the front of the lab. Midori asked, "Isn't your parents coming too?"

I looked at her with a face that tells her no, she was technically playing around, but sometimes she was actually serious. Then, Catherine, Magnus, and Pella came into the room and I said, "Alright, Edward, Midori, quantum teleport."

And we all popped up into a church at 10:48 PM. It was a decent sized church, there were enough seats, and there was the stand in front with the painted glass window up high with Jesus on it. It was a more interesting seeing the moonlight seeping through the window of the entrance to the building. Edward then said, "Wait, Siliveisa and Kevanin are also joining."

I told him, "Alright, go get them, and bring the Bible as well. You can't have a wedding without the Bible, since you're going to be the one having Arenmo and your sister get married."

Edward rolled his eyes and poofed off. We waited about 20 minutes, then Edward came back with his family and I asked, "Unless you were dealing with Islamic bastards, I don't think it takes that long."

All that damn Gallade did was say, "Well, I bumped into grandfather and I told him about the wedding that was going on and his first thing was you actually getting married."

I asked, "Then you told him about Arenmo and Rose, and you got into a small fight, then your wife pulled you off, and you popped up here explaining me all that shit?"

Edward paused a bit and said, "Right."

So, Edward got to the stand and turned to everyone. Arenmo was brought to the front of the stand, then I led Rose to the front and I walked back to my seat next to Midori. Edward began the whole process of the marriage, then, Magnus played the light tune which I recognized as "Sunrise, Sunset". I held my laugh and took off my hat, and then the music began as Midori connected our minds as we telepathically sing:

(ME): _Is this the little girl I carried?_

(BENDER): _Is this the little boy at play?_

(MIDORI): _I don't remember growing older._

(HELEVA): _When did they?_

(ME): _When did she get to be a beauty?_

(BENDER): _When did he grow to be finely tall?_

(MIDORI): _Wasn't it yesterday when they were small?_

(ALL FOUR): _Sunrise, sunset, sunrise, sunset, swiftly flow the days. Seedlings turn overnight to sunflowers; blossoming even as we gaze._

(MIODRI AND HELEVA): _Sunrise, sunset, sunrise, sunset, swiftly fly the years. One season following another; laden with happiness and tears._

(ME): _What words of wisdom can I give them?_

(BENDER): _How can I help to ease their way?_

(MIDORI): _Now they must learn from one another._

(HELEVA): _Day, by, day._

(MAGNUS): _They look so natural together._

(CATHERINE): _Just like two newlyweds would be_.

(MAGNUS AND CATHERINE): _Is there a canopy in store, for, me?_

(EVERYONE): _Sunrise, sunset, sunrise, sunset, swiftly fly the years. One season following another; laden with happiness; and teeeears._

Then after it ended, we see Rose and Arenmo kiss as Edward has pronounced them married. Ten minutes after the marriage, I gave Rose and Arenmo a pair of mega evolve gems. Rose was surprised and all I said was, "Here's a wedding gift."

We all teleported back to the lab, well Edward had to go back to get Siliveisa and Kevanin. However, we all went to sleep and in the morning, he still wasn't back. I look at the clock on the wall and say, "Where the fuck is Edward?"

My father comes out of his room and asks, "How did the 'wedding' go?"

I said, "It went great until Edward somehow got…"

Then Edward pops up with two male police officers and Siliveisa. I look at the group knowing something got fucked up and ask, "What the fuck happened?"

The white police officer came up saying, "Are you a Mr. Italy?"

"If that's not my name, then you're the president."

"This is your, um, son, correct?"

"Yeah."

"First off, that is one hell of a kid to have."

"Yeah, I just got my daughter married yesterday."

The officer just nodded and said, "Hmm, Congratulations; anyway, your son's, well, son, was found at 1:54 AM last night stealing off two bottles of Rum."

I say, "Damn, the genetics pass on. Also, how much does the Rum cost?"

"$95."

I pulled out a hundred saying, "Here's a hundred. Keep the five as an inconvenience…"

The officer pushed it back saying, "Give that to the shop, not me. We just need to know because seeing as he was a Pokémon, amazingly, I thought you were his trainer, not his father."

"Well, Edward does know a lot of my world's legalities and I'm sure bailing Kevanin isn't that much, right?"

The officer looked around saying, "So that's what the Frogadier's name is. Ok, the total bail amount is $350 plus the Rum."

I swayed my hand saying, "Easy pay, I'll bail him out."

I teleported back to my world, paid the fine, Kevanin was getting yelled and scolded at by his mother, a quarter of the amount by Edward, I finally relaxed, and a newlywed couple came into the picture. I'm definitely living la vida loca.

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	19. Prequel to Yugo's Adventure of Kalos

**By tomorrow, this'll be a one year old story, marking my one year anniversary on the site! Thanks to everyone for reviews and shit, this is the prologue to the new main story.**

 **Enjoy!**

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CHAPTER 17:

(Eight years later)

It was morning in Kalos, the sun just peaking over the horizon, and in a forest was a large house/gym. Yes, it was a gym leader's gym and a house put together. Whose house you might ask? This was Frank's house, only now it belonged to his daughter. Once Rose and Arenmo had their first kid, Frank gave them his old house so they can give their child a better place… and a good thing since their kid wasn't a Pokémon. Yep, it was a human… with a few Pokémon like features.

This child was first born with the back of his head in a kind of an orange fluff, eyes were very unusual blend of colors, and his hair was red. As he grew older, he became a nine year old looking kid at age four. The features began to show more and more with the back of his head now fine, smooth feathers, his hair red like a Zoroark, and notably was already growing a type of body hair of a Zoroark as well. He also had two twin sisters, Zoroark's as well, and Gardevoir features appeared on them such as the green colors seeping out and their psychic abilities showing.

Right now, all three are teenagers, under the human aging system, and… they're a little frisky. Well, to a certain degree behind their parents, but at least they got along good. Now, who is this child? His name is Yugokil Blazik, he's more or less known for being one of the grandchildren of Prof. Italy, and he had one small goal of beating his grandfather.

Now, why beat his grandfather you might ask. Well, Frank is pretty much undefeated as he began to become "invincible" due to Yugo's uncle Edward. You should know by now that Edward is like his father in terms of hard to kill, a badass, and a pain in the ass. Difference, Frank is a two timer, a thief, a gangster trader, black marketer, Pokémon murderer, and secretly known for killing Ash Ketchum; Edward only steals. Now, a few have tried to get Italy arrested, but bribery, and threatening to nuke Kalos/the whole fucking planet, kept him away from getting a jail sentence.

Right now, Yugo worked in the Kalos lab for the last two years and he's been trying to get as many things under his belt as possible. He's been learning moves, watching how his grandfather's tricks work, any sort of patterns that can be memorized, and if there was a way to get some attachments for free. Sure, mega evolve gems, artificial Z-crystals because Frank stole some tech from Aether, and some move learning, no problem. Yugo's impossible task is beating Uncle Edward. There was literally no way to kick Edward's ass anytime soon because Edward went against up that Zygarde 50%, but back then he won against it by literally the chances even slimmer than the Kennedy election, then got sent to the Pokécenter for a week.

That being said, tomorrow he was going to the lab and at the end of the day, he was going to look at his grandfather straight in the eye, and he was going to tell him in the words, "I'm gonna be a trainer and kick your ass!"

He thought he might get lectured and spieled, or a pat on the head for a joke, or it might happen.

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